This is where I rain on you

Fidelity

Brains are cool!

sunshine

sunshine
6 degrees of seperation

hello

hits


Thursday, June 29, 2006


sins will happen

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Phoebe's Ultraman and I'm Captain Planet

Hello Blogspot , I build shitcastles and hang from trees in hope I'll be mistaken for a bat for a living.I believe that eating popcorn is the way of life and growing fat is a trend.Wanna be my friend?Anyway , I had an awesome day today bay gay ray lay let's get laid.We played Grounded during physics lesson.For those of you sorry bunch of childhood-less mofos ,Grounded's this game where you move around without touching the ground and it's like catching with blind mice put together like a milkshake bake cake.and then you ask me so how the fuck am I suppose to get away?! This is the part where I come in and tell you that you can go on the ground BUT quietly and when the catcher says grounded you have to be off the ground or else you'll be the grounder.Get it now? Didn't think so.Well , it doesn't matter cause yoda's gotta be off the bed now and hibernate so maybe she can invest sleep for soccer later.by the way , singapore idol is buay tahan la.

my mum's fart smells like a dead monkey :)

so , happy belated gay pride!

Tuesday, June 27, 2006




DESTINATION:BEAUTIFUL

Monday, June 26, 2006


Dear God ,
If I had one wish
It would be to have a volume controller..
on my mother's neck
thank you , hope to hear from you soon.
xoxo
Marisse



please show me something that could shake my bones ,
the comfort of your hand is gone.
but it's all the same
cause what happened was only affairs in my mind.
I've been sinking through my magic couch humming a ghostly tune.
cause seeing the phantom of the past brings back the rapid hope lost.
but , it's all the same it was a memory
of something sweet.

Sunday, June 25, 2006


I've been locked in your heart shaped box for a week now
die romantic romantic

Friday, June 23, 2006

You put the gun in my head.
hello world wide web , meet caracal!


Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Hello, grab your bag and let's go
More out of place than anything you know.
Like an opera at a disco
When all you wanted was a rock show tonight.
These lights, are they hanging in a distance?
Did they glimmer for an instant?
When they're shining do you feel alright?
Know love, you were looking good tonight
This is the last call.
Too long to list it.
Please don't you miss it.
Don't give up and let them hold you down
And when they tell you we could burn this town.
Scream, waking from a bad dream
Don't think anything is what it seems.
Can't you figure out what this means?
Don't sit back and keep your hands clean today.
We'll say maybe we can find a new way.
Or create another great, cliche.
Storms are coming, why don't we play?
Instead of sitting, dancing in the rain today.
So long, they tried to tell you that you don't belong.
So, I guess we'll have to prove them wrong.
Pretty soon we'll hear them sing a long.
Ain't it funny that it's our song
So long , This is the last call.
tomorrow's going to be a bad day.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006


Every once in a while.We'd get lost in the crowd and get ashamed and never want to admit that we did get lost in the crowd.Can't you see I'm sorry?My mistakes have mislead all of you.I'll try to keep my stupid mouth shut.
Have you ever woke up in the morning and ask yourself what time it really is cause it feels like four in the afternoon when it actually really is 10 in the morning.You feel as if you've been wall-ed by the world for a very long time when actually you've only been sleeping?well , today is one of those days for me.I was suppose to attend daily mass with J , Nigelly and Kim but I overslept.I woke up feeling as if I've wasted my life on sleeping but contradicted myself and went back to sleep cause of a weirdo dream.You know how it is when you dream of something interesting and just want to go back to sleep and dream some more and find out the ending of the story? haha , oh yes I forgot to ask , how has everyone been this holiday?




I've been thinking alot lately about the clouds

Monday, June 19, 2006


so broken , nadia huggins



put me in the hourglass ,
woke up with revolution
emotions are always temporary.
manson says : suicide is painless , it brings on many changes.
amen to that.ironic aye? saying amen to something manson said.
oh well , chirpy chirpy

Sunday, June 18, 2006


hello my name is marisse , I'm 16 years old this year.I haven't gotten enough sleep for the pass 3 days and is/am dying.I'm currently participating in the summer of abandon words.I'm being very random and so I want to tell you everything.I have no idea what I'm saying but what I know is I'm going to sleep in a few minutes time.haha , I'm getting so disgustingly lame & fat.you might as well call me andy malonakins.not that I hate the guy infact , I'm quite the fan.I got ripped off by my manager at fish&co.My pay's only 71 dollars this month and there won't be a next month cause I quit my job.Too much politics at fuck&co.ok , I'm brain dead.I've had my lunar rhythms for almost two weeks.someone kill me.
Subtle insanity , has my reflection impacted your non-conforming pattern
Baby Biggay & Girlfriend :)
THE ARAB ADDICTION

Friday, June 16, 2006

I'm Marisse and I love Vicky
happy birthday Emo! :) I love you
Hello world wide web,
I had dinner with Alicia at Bliss today , it was fun.
I came to Vic's party when it just ended
I'm a bitch , g'night.





I promised pictures , from indo :)

Got this from R's blog ( yes , what a lazy afternoon)


What's your favorite....

Beverage (non-alc) ? Juices ( very vague , i know)
Color ? Red
Food ? I live to eat man! haha , how am I suppose to pick?
Item of clothing ? right now , My dress and slacks
Meal of the day ? lunch?
Feature on yourself ? My legs , cause people like them so I go with the flo ,haha.
Phrase ? "I like eggs & brains "
Song ? currently , midnight highway.
Musical Artist/Band ? no favourites but if I were at knife point I'd say DC
Sport ? I breathe sports haha so , swimming is good.
Movie ? I forgot? haha :/
TV Show ? DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES HAHAHA
Radio Station ? I don't listen to the radio so much anymore but I listen to 98.7 in morning. haha
Type of Chocolate ? The ones from SIN :D haha
Eye Color ? I'd stick with brown cause mine are brown and I heart marisse haha :)

Do you/Have you ever....

Have any pets ? Rabbits , cats , dogs , turtles , fishes had them all.haha
Have any piercing? yes
Have any tattoos ? nope but I think I will be getting one this year.
Gone skinny dipping ? yes , awesome fun! haha
Been to Europe ? sadly , no.
Been to an island ? yes
Had stitches ? no
Broken any bones ? no
Been stabbed/shot ? stabbed ahaha stupid incident.
Slept until after 12:00 ? yes
Stayed up all night ? yes
Turned down a dare ? yes

Which friend....

Is the funniest ? theresa misso! hahaha
Is the prettiest ? stupid question.
Is the most handsome ? fuck off. haha
Is the loudest ? Charis & Jamine
Is the craziest ?We're all crazy.
Is the most shy ? since R said hui zhen and she's my friend too , huizhen haha
Is the most loving ? Alicia Tan haha , like my freaking mother or smth.haha
Is the most understanding ? -
Is the most boring ? haha , can I not answer the question? haha
Is the richest ? kelly?Rachel?Kim?stupid rich people hahahahaha
Is the most athletic ? BIRD HAHA
Is the most cocky ? EMELINE
Is the most wordly/cultured ? Alyssa? hahaahaha
Do you look up to the most ?Can't remember.
Do you tell everything to ? V and alot of other people hahahaha
Has the best clothes ? uhleesha
Has the best house ? STACY HAHA
Would you ever....
Eat pizza with chocolate chips ? nope
Kiss someone of the same sex ? already did
Cheat on someone you love ? probably not.
Run away from home ? already did
Lie to your parents ? already did
Lie to your boyfriend/girlfriend ? haha , of course
Lie to your best friend ? already did
Give a homeless person money ? already did
Run from the police ? hahahah , maybe?probably not
Bungee jump ? I WANT TO DO THIS
Sky dive ? i want
Cross dress ? i want
Be an exotic dancer ? i want , if I had a body like jessica alba or smth
Walk out of a restaurant without paying ? nope
Scuba dive ? i want
Go rock climbing ? already did
Go spulunking (caving) ? i want
What do you think of when you hear....
Eminem ? slim shady
Bologna ? vomit haha
GuysOrange ?Orange Julius
The show, LostCucumber ? ???? Dicks then Vomit haha
Hip-Hop ?Dancing
Uniform ?school
UniCORN ? stupid
Rainbow ? gay pride haha
Clown ?I took a picture of one the other day.



I had a fruitful week.

Monday -Biggay's birthday/happening
Tuesday-Town with A & V
Wednesday-Awesome Alyssa
Thursday -Lunch with Kelly & V at arab street( yes , again!? haha) and hung out with my CLIQUE haha

and for today I had lunch with an old friend her name is Jasmine , thanks everything babe.
I realise how much I've missed your presence in my daily affairs! haha , I will be meeting Alicia
later.Finally! I've not seen her in a while too.Then will be heading to V's house for Vic's party and to stay over.We're going to beach tomorrow at 8 and I need to rush off to work by 11.My shift will end at 5 and I'll have to rush home to change and meet the happening people in church by 6.15 for mass then we're going to catch X-men 3.How awesome is that!? hahaha ok , blog later.gotta run! :)

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

DULZARAMASA
If I told you I cared
would it freaking matter?
I am nothing more but a line in your book.
Can't you tell I have more to say.
well , no one knows for sure.
thank you leeyah , for everything :)




Cause anything too daring to say to you would be said in this letter and burned away.
So you never realise I'm here.
watch the embers from the letter float and dissapear.
We'll have you screaming back for more.




Tuesday, June 13, 2006


the fatal fall ,



I took this before dropping brainticia onto the floor.For those who have no idea who she is, she's my camera.The filter cracked and now I'm worrying about the insides.I could've swore that I closed my bag man. I keep telling myself to let it go cause we all make mistakes but my mum keeps rubbing it in.hello? not as if I deliberately threw my camera on the floor or something.I had no intention of dropping her at all.And as if I could predict what was going to happen anyway.Damn! now I have to raise 125 dollars for my filter and IC.Yes , marisse lost her fucking IC as well but that was months ago.I just really need to get it replace before my mum finds out in other words , I need to use my own money to get the following items haha. IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO HELP ME OUT AND DONATE ME SOME MONEY IT WOULD BE VERY NICE OF YOU!haha , oh well I doubt I'll get replies but it's worth a try anyway.I took this shot cause I want the world to see how beautiful the moon is getting nowadays but you know with my kind of skills in photography I tend to fail to deliver.Oh well , if I fail then I fail at least I gave it a shot.To sum up my day , I though the omen was awesome enough for me , till then! :)

Monday, June 12, 2006

Dedicated to , Akiko.
This is just sort of a follow up to my parent complaining shit.haha , yes what a drag.anyway,V's rodents gave birthr reccently and I wanted to touch them but then I realise that the mother would probably eat them If I did.you know , so that they can protect them?Then It got me thinking about how some of my parents are and how my mum is becoming now.you know? like the typicial singaporean parent , overprotective.Which is so damn fucking stupid.Just like how the hamster/rat eats its babies over parents like to control our lives so much.Why can't they just face the fact that we need to make these mistakes so we can learn from them? I mean like jumping off the second story when we were kids our parents would tell us to be careful and tell us not to jump but we don't know how bad it really is until we take the jump then we learn our lesson right? (not that i'm saying you should try it haha , it's just an example)If we didn't jump we'd be left wondering how it actually feels like to jump off the second story and stuff.ok maybe it's just the brain deadness talking..haha.well , my mum doesn't really like A to stay over and stuff but he's just my bestfriend( just a label) that's all.I mean hello? not as if I'm going to fuck him or anything.Parents just don't fucking trust us.and to love is to trust.so it comes down to the point where I ask myself does she love me for who I am or love me as a possession?I mean to love someone is one thing to know and care for that someone? is whole different story.Anyway , I'm getting retarded maybe it's the lack of sleep.But my day today was awesome! I woke up having only half an hour to leave punggol and head down to meet the balai people to go to changi.I had alot of fun with them.I realise catholics(trying not to stereotype here) are alot of fun to be with cause they're usually kinda wild and never run out of things to talk about and when we do , we talk about music haha.Anyway we spent alot of time planning and running away from simeon. haha , this weirdo , ask me. haha anyway then I headed down to V's place had alot of fun there too catched up with her quite abit anyway , I'm really tired so g'night.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BIGGAY!
MY WOMAN ,
MY BABY ,
MY LOVE! :)

Friday, June 09, 2006





I might give up on photography.
oh yea , to Val, I use the digital slr , canon eos 350D.
back to the subject , why am I giving up on photography?
Because I've an unsupportive mum who bought the camera
pretending that she's being supportive but her real motive
was so she could use it against me the next time
she's threatening me with money and other stuff.
Parents , I don't get them.
Why do they want to quarrell with us
When we really can't give a shit about what they think.
Can't they tell we're already all so worn out by them
their yelling , the insults they're all getting a little old.
Take my mum for example.Everytime she's pissed of,
she'll use her loud-hailer-ed-mouth and call me an ungrateful bitch
which is very untrue cause apparently , I'm the totally opposite of that.
What in the world is going through her mind? I don't know
and I don't think I really care.
I feel so pissed off right now I can barely think.
I want to swear off like a fucking machine gun.

I don't get it, really.
Why the fuck do parents and teachers like to threaten us
with stuff that we love or need like our hobbies
and our testimonials.like threatening us will fucking work?!
fuck these fucking motherfuckers!
now I have to go for confession!stupid bitches make me sin.
haha.anyway, it all started out with my mum yelling
countinously about my fucking room which I barely use anyway
she wants me to fucking spring clean it.
I'm totally fine with that but it's only like fucking 8 am in the
fucking morning and I haven't slept for a day?
It's so unhealthy for me but no she doesn't care.
It's all about her , bloody son of a gun.
I tried not to answer back cause it'll just lengthen the
so called 'battle'.I just said stop shouting and or , stop nagging.
and she didnt' stop and she got louder.what the fuck.
her disfunctional brains don't work
did she get the info that came out of mouth wrongly?
I said stop not shout louder.Then I just had to leave the house
I said I was getting breakfast then I went down in hopes
she'll be gone for work when I came home.
So I went up and into her room to find that she was about the
hide my camera.oh sweet mother of Jesus , this woman
will be the death of me one fine day I tell you!
what is she? like seven?! How primary school students would
hide their friends stuff as a revenge plan?what in the world!?
I really can't fucking stand it anymore.
I can't wait for the day I'll have the guts to throw my baby
right at her face and give up on photography.
although , I really really love it ): oh well.


close my eyes , I want you to dissapear.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Come as you are,
as you were,
As I want you to be
As a friend,
As a friend,
As an old enemy
Take your time,
hurry up
The choice is yours,
don't be late.
Take a rest, as a friend,
As an old memoria
And I swear that I don't have a gun
No, I don't have a gun

Guess who's back?
Back again , Marisse's back!
Tell a friend.

Tanjung Balai ,Broken is beautiful
Simplicity is bliss , really.
anyway , I think I've become stupid and boring
so here are some peetours from the trip.
remember to comment on it alright?
akira's opinion doesn't matter.
anyway , to all that tagged my board
ASHLEY , AMIRAH , ALYSSA,
DORY , BIGGAY , VAL ,
TIMO , LEEZOO , NANNY ,
YING , AKIKO AND THIRTEEN :D ,
THANKS FOR THE TAGS BUT THERE ARE TOO MANY TO REPLY
and no , I'm not acting popular cause I am ahah just playing.
I'm just too G*d-damn lazy to reply but it's nice anyway :)
ok , blogger is fucking up and it's a fucking pisser
so post the peetours later.





I think I'm starting over.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Mama Mehrisk & Baby Biggay :)


TELL ME WHY I LOVE LEEZOO AND NANNY'S COMPANY SO MUCH?!HAHAHA

with love ,

Marisse

Friday, June 02, 2006

For Awesome Alyssa Woo-hoo :)

Seven random facts:


I like red
I like eggs , really
I have many clothes but always end up wearing the same thing because it's 'convenient'. (same as alyssa)
I always inferior alot and feel unworthy of praise.
Sometimes I think I'm pretending my emotions.
I fear a painful death but want to try getting into a coma


Seven celebrity crushes:

Katherine Moening
Mia krishner
Howlin pelle
Kurt Cobain
Orlando Bloom
Quinn
Adamn Brody!( who doesnt?!)

Seven qualities I want in a potential boyfriend (need not apply HAHA):
...........................I'm having a hard time thinking of this...


Musically/Aesthetically inclined
Open - minded
Nice face (including hair hahaha)
Commitment
Complex mind
Forgiving
Romance Romance (but not in the mushy sense la! like you are the air I breathe and all the lame shit)

Seven things that scare me:

Heaven & Hell
Being locked alone in an enclose area
Akira
My Mind
Losing anyone related to me (blood or not blood , both ways)
Losing any of my five senses.
Being a failure


Seven things I like/love most:


Rain
Music
Religon
Emotions
People related to me
Complex minds in other words arty people
Seeing people happy



Seven things I plan to do before I die:
( you know this was an on the spot thing so it won't be so interesting haha)

Visit Amsterdamn , Spain , Rhio and alot of other places
Open a club , cafe and gallery
Adopt a spanish kid and a cambodian kid
Do up my the beautiful people album
Lose weight HAHAHA
Say how I really feel towards everyone I know individually.
Play the piano , guitar , bass and cello really well haha :D


Seven random songs at the moment:


on & on - number one gun
again I go unnoticed - DC
Re-offenders - travis
Bed of razors - children of bodom
Capital H - the motion city soundtrack
Midnight highway - daphne loves derby
Sweet dreams - Marilyn Manson


Seven people I want to do this (Do I really? Would they really?):


Vicky
Akira
Natalie
Charlene
Russell
Alicia
Tangy


I can confidentally say that all but Vick will not do it hahaha cause I doubt they'll even see this so whatever :)

Had alot fun tonight thank you
Vick , Tanny , Lizard ,
Akira , Mark , Joey and SURIA
I promise photos , real retarded ones

night :D

Wednesday, May 31, 2006










SOME RANDOM SHOTS I TOOK TODAY WITH BRAINTICIA :)


my mum's collections of weirdo stuff from God knows where ,
Brainticia and I,
sign from bloomington from years ago,
my living room,
my snapple collection,
my window which I scribble my thoughts on
and last but not least , my damn disgusting wall :)

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Let's just hope nothing happens


well well well , I woke up this morning finding that akira didn't come to wake me up and also to find that my mother's loud device called her mouth was yapping at me about the warrenty card to my brainticia( my new cam , I just had to name her)Anyway ,Mos sucked big time.It's one of those parties you go to and hope to die.Anyhows , I'm off to camp now! till then :)

Monday, May 29, 2006



I've always wanted to go running in the rain butt fucking naked =/ hah

how about it? I've come to a conclusion that I truly am crazy.( yes , marisse! you've finally come to realise that! that took you awfully long!) But I need to ask , sometimes just sometimes well for me most of the time but have you ever gone absolutely insane over someone's certain feature or character trait or whatever else works for you?Well I have.I've reccently come to know of this boy( yea , I can't believe it's a boy) with a brilliant mind.He's awesome and he's probably to die for which most girls consider already but that's not the point.The ways of a beautiful mind works volumes compared to beautiful eyes and he comes with looks tho it's like a bonus or something for whoever who falls for him.Anyway that's totally besides the point but this guy is driving me mad and I just want to crack his mind.People have never really interested me for a long perioud but he's different and the worse part is , I don't even know him.You know how it is that only once in a while people that will create an impact in your life pop by and they only stay for a short while.People like Vicky for example ,she's probably the most matured person I know in my circle of friends it's almost amazing but I've cracked her mind so it's getting kind of boring , no offence vicky I still love you anyhows.But trying to crack someone's mind can really make time fly which is totally awesome considering my age and how much time I have in my hand and travelling home from work during the 78923678627893 hour bus ride will be time well spent if i were cracking someone's mind hahaha ok , I sound delirious.Must be the lack of sleep or something.Anyway, I bought 2 topmen shirts today and two underweears and I finally made my ezilink card.
ok nowwwwww everyone say , awesome!

Saturday, May 27, 2006



Paradise city is way too far honey



well , I just got home since yesterday.
Yea yea , what a rookie I am but I've got an excuse
I didn't stay out so late in the streets yesterday
We left clarke quay at 4 which isn't so bad
cause we usually wait for the first bus
and spasz around for a while
but pris had to get home early
so we crashed at the ah lian's place
but joey , mark and suriya(?) went home ahead
so it was just akira and I nothing new.
but chilled at the ah lian's place
and fell asleep.
Woke up a few times cause of phone calls
decided to switch it to silent mode
then we woke up 12 hours later
realizing stacy already left
and she didn't wake us up.
I've never rested so much in the whole month
and on the first day I slept like a dead log
haha anyway , I'm heading to town now.
so see you'll later :D

Wednesday, May 24, 2006



Meet Charlene ,


Well , it's been raining all afternoon today and it's awesome! cause I love rainy weathers not only is it cooling but It's a perfect time to feel low.But I don't have time for that right now cause I've got work at five! It's been sucking the life out of me.oh well , till then!

Monday, May 22, 2006



this isn't fair cause he penetrates me with his stare.

keeping up appearences.
Fooling my selfish heart.
You say you love me , don't do it again.
I'm so confused.
Please tell me what's happening.
I want her to read me.
The blazing mind of an apple pie.
I'm lost , I'm lost.
Fall so hard , I'll never be able to get up again.
Indecipherable words I scribble on my wall.
I want to stop pretending.
I might not be able to take it any longer.
You mean I'm supposet to leave my roots on this ground forever?
Why must I do so?
Vaguely familiar , I sold my soul to work yesterday.
Maybe I'm tired but I doubt so.
I'm so scared , help?

Thursday, May 18, 2006



So quiet
Another wasted night
The television steals the conversation
Exhale
Another wasted breath
Again it goes unnoticed




it's days like this I wish I'd just dissapear into thin air
run away from the world into the middle of nowhere
as the pages of this book flips and flips
another chapter of your book begins.
sometimes something happy would be nice
people get sick of being nice
sometimes I think what's the use when I get nothing in return
ok the warmth and smiles really nice but really , It just lasts
for a moment or two.Hoping wishing dreaming that someone would
do the same but it never happens and it feels so lame
I will not conform to the trends of the society.
trend whores , trend whores you wreck the minds of the beautiful
you spill your beans to the rest of your junkies
and take away the beauty of being unique.
love's a decision , love's a bitch
love's the big boss sitting and shaking his legs at the top of
the building while we all move like slave to accomodate with it
it's a pain in this , low paying job
and pay raise happiness never last for long.
so we quit and find new jobs , if you know what I mean.
oh well enough said , work was tiresome.
tomorrow's going to be another day ahead :)



hello! good evening and welcome to fish&co , my name is marisse and I will be serving you today.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006



I'm just a phone call away , I say over and over again.

Hello dearies , Today was my first day of work at fish & co at suntec city.All of you are most welcome to pop by and say hi to me cause it'll probably make my day since you know work's all about the pressure , pressure brings pleasure I suppose.hah.And thank you to those who came down to see me work.hah.Feels like I'm some sort of rare speciment and was never meant to work or something.But work was pretty much awesome.Everyone there was extremely nice and I have a dyke manager how awesome is that?I'm so dead now , I can barely think.Maybe it's the 5 hours Akira took from me for talking on the phone not saying it wasn't enjoyable , of course it was.that's why i stayed on the line.I need sleep as you can see , I've been pretty much dreaming of sleep.I have work tomorrow again from 5/6 to closing another day ripped away from me cause of money and no friends.friday's going to be extremely tiring.I want to sleep in , help?While working as the greeter of the retaurant I had to smile like 24/7 which was seriously a pain in the ass , since I'm burning like the sun on the insides.But It actually feels good when people smile back.It actually makes my day.It's the simple things that goes really far if you realise.Oh well , I can't wait for june , more flexibility.Ok , gotta run and catch up on some beauty sleep , love! :)


I'm missing out on so many things , please don't forget me.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

I'm fooling my selfish heart and going through the emotions like how the wind blows.


hello world on my penis just that I don't have one dot com.hello bloody faggots who read my blog and judge me and don't understand me.pardon me , I'm just busy getting depressed and acting like I'm part of the non-conforming crowd.Why does it always have to rain on me?Life is fucking yo-yo.I fucked twisted cannot be unwind even with kerosene lousy brand from the mama shop yo-yo.I listen to loser rock , wanna be my friend?And I've been dying to reach out to all of you.How has your day been everybody?I had a great day today , I played block catching after dinner with Akira , Mark , Siewhwee and Pris :)



cause the world's gonna want to turn you into everyone else.


XOXO

Monday, May 15, 2006


ok , I've finally absorbed the fact that you're gone.

bye bye beautiful.today someone who connected with me before died.he's my mother's band mate and I haven't really spoke to him in awhile but you know how some people just affect your life in a way even if its so subtle that you don't really notice that it's even there and when the person is gone you realise , hey! you've affected my life and I want to thank you for that but , he's gone.Sometimes We all wonder , why can't God just take to bad guys away why does he always have to take the good ones.but soon you realise that their time on earth is over.They've done their part to affect you life and they never really die because they still are very much alive in our minds be it vaguely , subconciously or vividly.But there's also the why God why?! what about me?I'm suffering so badly without him and that just goes to show how your suicide/death will kill alot of people emotionally so why make the ones around you suffer.akira , don't kill yourself.this summer is going to bleed my heart dry and I know it.I'm going to be emotionally ready for it and I can't believe I'm lying through my teeth again.It's going to kill me.I want you to lead me on.Please don't go stay , please?things like death & love will never change.Once its done it'll forever be there in our hearts like I've said , vaguely , subconciously or vividly.And Death & love a like , they're unpredictable.There goes another eye-lash wish dedication going to you.I feel like I've known you all my life.If we talk , we'd probably talk all night about the rest of our lives and when you're down I'll never leave.Please don't let me crumble on my kitchen floor , cry and realise that you were never meant for me , please?


and there's another guardian angel watching over us.


HELLO I'M FROM BOOB WONDERLAND! :D

THREE AMAZINGLY ABNORMALLY RETARDED BUT INTERESTING BLOGS I'VE READ TODAY :

V ; simply retarded

Michelle ; the american life to be.

Zoe ; Pangsai at Longkang :)



I'm falling for what is wrong and will never be meant for me.



Could you be my answer
Could you tell me that I am
The perfect one for you
You're the perfect one for me

Could you be too faithful
Could you show me anymore
It's the perfect thing to do
It's the perfect thing for me

On and on I see you
The life that comes together
To see that we're forever
On and on I see you
The times we've spent together
The times that last forever

And now we will find our way
It's the way that we'll find this day
And I know you belong to me

Could you lead me on?

Saturday, May 13, 2006




the photo's not awesome but it's worth the memory :)
power rangers here to save the day before bed time.
happy gaypride/pangsai day!




we will , we will , gay you like a man whore
never let you say no more
we will , we will , gay you like a drag queen
pierce your nipple with a pin
wear a strap on do the swing!



THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME HAPPY!

saturday was awesome , time well spent with my friends.
as always I'd mention the people I hung out with
and they are V , Ah lian , Akira , Zoe ,
Mark , Joey , Sexy(R) , Chunky(Ju) , Nana , Jacky
and hell lot of other people at eme's party
I had a hell of a time dudes! thank you guys for that.
Thank you Akira and Mark for spending 3 consequtive days
with Me and yes , I know I'm a pain in the ass.
so thank you for putting up with me and my stunts.
it has been 3 crazy awesome days and you know what!
I still have 2 papers! ahahahah someone slap me please?!
first it was the throwing of wax which we got from the
nativity church.well , Akira , Mark , Siewhwee and I
got some dried wax from the churches' prayer thing
and we went on the overhead bridge and threw it at cars
that drove pass.I'm sorry If you happen to pass there.
You know boys will be boys yes , I'm not a girl.
well , that's in akira's and mark's world.
anyway , I had an awesome time.
then it went on to the next day at pangsai party
which was suppose to be at the maple park longkang
but shifted to emo's house.
and everyone looked well downright , replusive.
but it was sweet! hahaha anyway , then sexy , baby biggay,
chunky , Zoeee the angel and I went on to have our
gay pride at town in our crazy outfits.
yea , us and our crazy antics.
we even came up with our own anthem for our gay pride! :D
I had an awesome time and I went for the vertical rush gig
at the esplanade with Baby Biggay(V) , Zoe the angel , Ah lian ,
Akira , Mark , Joey and some guy.Awesome shit!
I like the song angels by vertical rush.
Ok , I should stop getting emo , it's tiring.
Jesus , Send me someone to save me from my misery.


Wounded angels still smile and these roots will never leave the ground.

Friday, May 12, 2006


Meet Tony Ward , He's Awesome!

[edited]

In need of someone to pull me off the computer seat.Marisse Caine has been seating infront of the computer for nearly six hours I guess it's true , I'm a computer addict and a photography whore. haha , I photoshopped for about two hours straight then I went on to watching one tree hill haha yes , yet another thing to get addicted to g*d Marisse , what the fuck is wrong with your brains are they running around? Anyway , Sometimes I wonder if people actually read my stuff or they just come here to view my work and other people's work of course.I've got to give credit to all the awesome photographers out there.It doesn't really matter cause It's flattering both ways.So here's what has been going down with me.


Friends;

Due to the current exams (well , it's sort of over for me cause it's just practical) I've been neglecting some of my friends and I haven't really been deep talking with anybody and getting to know how the other person's feeling anyway , It's about time I started hanging out with V and the rest again and probably re-connect old friendships since june's just two or three weeks away like how I'll be going out with Hollx , Jas and a few others.I also want to make new friends I mean cause every holiday calls for new 'adventures'.I mean really ,when I was sec one I hung out with my basketball friends and the netballers and then it went on to sec two when I hung out with stacy ( yes , and had my ah lian phase ) and phoebs and then it went on to being sec three and that's when I hung out with V and the rest and then on to Akira and the rest and it's all just a big bunch of friend connectivity haha.whatever sometimes its so complex I can't be bothered to think well ,not that I'm a bimbo or anything it's cause I just really can't give a flying fuck.Maybe I have a sense of fear of what I'll be doing this summer but nonetheless , I'm looking forward to it and not to mention I'm going out with liying too :) someone I've never hung out with in my life haha.


Family;


I've been hanging out alot lately with my mum and now with her extra spice of lunar rhythms , she is pissing me off daily.So I think I would like to stay away from her for awhile and well , the fucker man finally emailed me after four months of being away since his last visit but he says he's becoming stable well , its about time.and the grandparents , their awesome as usual but a little exhausted cause of the little bugger Leon he's been quite the pain although of course there's a kick to it I mean babies , their God's gift and of course christbel's growing up and the rest of the family's doing fine.I just need to spend a little more time with them :D


Religon;

I'm catholic christian and I've been attending church religously.haha what's more to say? And yes , I've already mentioned in my past entry that I'm going for a mission trip on the 3rd to 5th of June.Well , I hope nothing much changes when I come back cause well , I don't want to miss a thing.


last but definately not the least..

Myself;

Haha ok , as you can see I'm quite the bomb in my own world haha I mean if you know me personally.but whatever , everyone's a narcissit sometimes.Gosh I haven't used that word in awhile haven't I.I used to use it all the name with phoebe when we were like sec two or smth? haha Ohhh , those were the days.My love life has been rather stagnent cause you know everyone's getting involved nobody very appealing to me that's single and available and even If they appeal enough I probably won't appeal to them since I'm a disgusting piece of lard haha. My grades have been improving surprisinly.I've made new friends.My hair grew and tummy grews as well and I haven't had my period in awhile.Haha ok that information was unnessacery and obscene haha but you know , whatever works for me. Yes , I will be going to the stupid MOS party cause I want to let loose and dance but of course there's the 4000 over people are going factor which actually stinks cause I don't want to have a 30 cm to 30 cm dance floor if you know what I mean.Anyway enough about myself I'm over estimating my self-importance again as usual.Ohhh deaaarr , I feel accomplished now.




It's been awhile , call me for coffee. Please ?

Thursday, May 11, 2006

what you guys look foward to:






here's another weather dedicated to the anthem of our dying lives.


make this right , as fast i can


during our mother tongue exam today there was a fucking bee flying around the exam hall and it go everyone freaked out and well , we started seeking shelter under our tables which was fucktarded anyway , then it got me thinking about this one time when i took photo of a this almost exact same bee and I got really close to it not feeling a sense of fear from the little prick.so here's the thing how am I able to stand so near to the damn thing and hide under the table when its flying when its the exact same thing.well ,this is just random but maybe its cause there was a sense of security coming for the bee.and thats what we all are looking for.the exit , namely a sense of security be it coming from a person or a thing or a talent and talent meaning so that you have a identity and that's what everyone is striving for.but you know , having a constant identity is pretty tiring well , that's my opinion.so I have this disorder called the ' i wanna be different from the whole g*d-damned world' syndrome. ok , i'm speechless with myself.


sins will happen , go figure.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006


you threw the purple on the floor and my heart fell.
no doubt , pain is love.



so here's the deal , there's this blood related person called mum
who brings you here and up in this well , pretty complexed fucked up
full of shit son of a gun it's the end of the world i hate myself and
want to die and maybe do a few good deeds so i can get vip passes to
heaven cause God must hate me for knowing me painful life.
and then at an exam that you were obviously not ready for cause of the
tremendous amount of pressure and physical abuse and verbal dirrohea your
so called mum is throwing up in your face.well , don't get me wrong its
not that she ain't cool or anything like that but she's just well , a S.O.B.
anyway ,so at this exam you freaking screw up and end up having to go to a
well extremely lousy stream and end up giving up at the first year cause of
well being rejected in the end when you thought hey why not try and make the
best out of the situation but no , you had to get rejected didn't you
well , cause I'm never good enough for anything.So this time round , you're
already secondary 4 and you have a chance to take the right path.so don't screw
it.so it sums up to this marisse , don't fucking screw up you bitch.
anyway , sins will happen. so it all comes down to this , you stay at home
your mind bitches well , not exactly bitches more like fucks with you(figure of speech).Sometimes I'd rather chill at the sunny beach with the shady people.If you know what I mean.ok this is a follow up to alyssa's blog , yes alot of people are becoming 'artistic'.Ok , if you really like photography and all that shit.Do it and mean it not like its just another trend.because its not a trend its a fucking sickness.Being able to look at something or someone and knowing which angle it will look beautiful in.ok whatever let's not get deep here.


note to self: no one wants to hear you complain and I'm sick of you talking about yourself you self-absorbed bitch.

hokay , time to shave my legs now , till then!

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

extinguished;


my friday was awesome!
first the lunch with mrs goh and ms chan
and then the retardation excursion with
Akira Ahlian Mark and Aunt Camel :)
this kinda fun happens once in a while
but I hope it'll happen again soon.
My saturday was terribly boring.
but you know whatever works for him!


sundays sundays , here I come! :)

Wednesday, May 03, 2006



I choke back each tear and bleed.

There is a tide in the affairs of men
Which takes out the flood
leads on to fortune
but who made the voyage of their lives are bound to shallows and miseries
and such a fall see every now a float
and we must take the crime when it serves
or lose the ventures before us



DOES ANYONE HAVE ONE TREE HILL? =/

Tuesday, May 02, 2006



29th , my lips will be of service

I made a bet with my friend that I will not talk to him for a month
well , everything is going smoothly , that's if I screw up.
Which I doubt for I am capable of doing anything If I put my mind
and soul into it well , at least that's what the counselor said.
haha no , I'm not mentally retarded or disturbed.
I just get into a lot of trouble for a hundred and one reasons
I feel like lizard sometimes , a fugitive
It might feel like shit some days but I know leaving this school
would be one of the last things I wanna do
cause of the people and being able to get away easily with the
crazy shit ass stunts I pull in school daily.
anyway , school started out pretty shitty and my eyes were painful
looking at Ms kok(no pun intended) and my head felt like a mine field
but I rest at the sick bay for about 4 hours talked to lying , S and J
and the sick bay for awhile before falling into deep slumber
even the sounds coming from PAP couldn't wake me up
I had a sick dream , It was pretty weird , not worth revealing here tho:)
I came home and slept again and had tennis and now , I'm here
you know how sometimes you realise that n.e.r.d?
well , I got this from listening to the radio
that the band's name actually stands for no one ever really dies.
ok , I know I'm slow and all but no need for rubbing in here! haha
Its pretty cool when you think about it.
I mean you may pass away but a part of you has always affected someone
else's life which to me is , pretty cool shit :)
anyway I'm going for a mission trip from the 3-5 of june
and I guess I'm pretty excited cause I get to spend time with some
orphan kids and yes , I really really love kids.
I'm even planning on not marrying and adopt 2 kids
one from spain and one from cambodia hahaha.
ok , I'm getting brain dead.
till then! :)



that's all that matters pretty pretty