hello my sweethearts. :D

My week has been rather relaxing
I'm happy to say , I don't hate anybody.
really , I'm not saying that just for saying sake
I'm so over the bitch phase.
I can actually stand proudly and say , I'VE MATURED.
I'm actually tired of bitching.
My way of dealing with things now is
Let the person get what she or he wants
leaving them satisfied with themselves
and know someday the will learn it the hard way
like how I did.I mean losing a friend like phoebe
It was sheer stupidity.I can only pray now
that nothing of that sort of shit will happen again.
I'm happy with my bestfriend.if we still are.
I doesn't matter she is to me anyway.
Phoebe , you're the one I spent most of my
happy times.The most dull parts of my life
and the whole nine yards.It's so cliche.
but friends forever?till the end , I hope.
Anyway , my style now is , compromise.
or at least somewhere along that line
I can't say for certain that I won't be the gossip folk again
I most definately will , but , I'll try.
If you find this boring , please do not go on.
Cause the fucking special shit is going to go on.
anyhows , not everyone can say they have a past
a past that had made an impact on alot of people, really.
this time , it's not the ego talking.
I mean I manage to get so many to here my story about 'us'
us as in refering to phoebe and I.
If you're part of the 'shit'
think of it my childish appetiate(sp?) for mean girls part two?
Anyway , Phoebe I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused you.
I hope this calls for new begginings cause it'd be s' wonderful
I remember us looking at other people and saying that
we'll never have a huge fight like this
and we would leave clothes at each other's house saying
we're going to see each other for the next 2 years anyway
I miss the ability to say all that without having to choke on my words.
let's start over , love you! (=
anyway , enuff of the mush mush.


boys will be boys.

Lovely.

Just like heaven

So much for the day off.I met gwen :D
We went to town didn't know what to do
bumped into treeshaaniniriripopo
and walked around and talked like
there was no tomorrow
so we caught a movie , just like heaven
It was awesome , really.
I wanted to cry but I guess I couldn't
considering I've been crying all afternoon
Due to the overwhelming reflectionatin(yes no such word)
Considering I'm such a hopeless romantic , It was really good.
I had a great time with gwen well , It has been long!
I have to say sorry to JH for being so harsh on him just now.
yeap , since I got that off my chest I feel better :)
Anyhoos ,for my so-called day off
I spent It playing the piano
Downloading songs , watching totally spice( HAHA Lizzie and suee)
I spent It crying and gettin very emo
It was really good , like therapy or smth
I feel lighther after crying.
It really helps anyhows , I'm off to sleep now
cause I have to go to church at 11.30 tomorrow.
PRAISE THE LORD ANYONE?

Hello world , sometimes I wonder whether people actually read my blog.
HAHA cause I'd be pretty embarassing cause sometimes I write stuff
that simply make no sense to other people.But obviously does to me.
Anyway , I've decided to take the day off for a day , I think
since my friend gwen just asked me out , I'm not sure I can take
the day off , ha-ha.anyway , for now I'm just going to chill out
with myself reflect on my life.maybe write a few songs.practice the
piano or just hibernate and go to sleep or maybe pamper myself
and take a really long bathe till my fingers turn pruney(sp?).
So after I reflect maybe just maybe , I might blog again.
so you if there are people reading my blog.

Stop crying your heart out

You know how sometimes people make you feel all special
For the moment , like you've never felt that way before
The person cannot stop corresponding with you
Like you're the b'all and end'all of ev'rything
but overnight you're nothing more than a friend?
You soon realise you've been nothing more than a fling
you were just used for some reasons
you kind of want to tell the person off.
but am afraid cause of the being too presumptous fact.
Oh yes , I forgot to mention
I wrote a song of my own a few days back
with a tune this time
so if you want to hear it , just ask me.
It's an emo song so If you're not into that kinda shit
please don't approach me for a demo.
cause it'll be a total waste of your time
on a lighther note ,
I went to chinablack yesterday
It was awesome! The people were great
the music was not bad , not bad at all.
We danced all night till the early morn
grinding and cribing
it was sweet!
I went to stacys' party today too.
It was alright.
I can't wait for the next chinablack party!
anyway I'm drained so , love!







But a Fling

For Vick , A simple game of copy and paste?

Rules of the game:
1) Post 5 weird or random facts about yourself.
2) At the end, write the names of 5 people whom you want to do this quiz, then tag in their blog to leave them a note to tell them to see your blog.
5 random facts about myself:
1. I like to shake my legs
2. I like to listen to loud music
3. I like my hair to smell good
4. I think I'm really cool
5. As much as I like loud music I love Silence.

5 PEOPLE I WANT
1. Vick
2. Alicia
3. Jenny
4. Bird
5.damn choices , how about the rest of the world?

Some other thing :

1. Vick
2. bird
3 alicia
4 su
5 tanny
6 lizard
7 ner
8 rachel
9 Esther
10 Alyssa
11 Jenny
12 Siewhwee
13 eunice
14 phoebe
15 julia
16 janice
17 dory
18 zoe
19 evon
20 ashley

How did you meet 13?:
Art festival

What would you do if you never met 5?
I'd probably die of dullness


What do you honestly think of 10?: She's AWESOME!

Have you ever liked 3?: how can I not love alicia tan.how can anyone?!

If 1 died tomorrow, what is one thing that you would like to do?: OH MY GOSH , ARE YOU KIDDIN , I'D PROBABLY CRY MYSELF TO DEATH , VICKY EH!

Would 2 and 11 make a good couple?: HAHAHA.BAD MENTAL IMAGE

Do you think 12 is hot?: She's cold and she's cruel but she knows I love her.

Would 1 and 17 make a lovely couple?:seems really wrong dude

Do you know any of 3's family members?: Yeap definately

On a scale of 1-10 how cute is 14?: Phoebe? superficially? probably 8


What would you do if 4 just professed their undying love for you: I would say I KNEW IT!how wouldn't love marisse man!?

What language does 19 speak?: English, never heard her spoke chinese before.

Who is 8 going out with?: With someone on this numbered list. I dont really think they would want me to announce it in any way.

Would 18 and 5 make a good couple?: No it's twisted.

When was the last time you talked to 6?: a few hours ago.

What is 18's favorite band?: HURH!?

Does 4 have any siblings?: 2 siblings.

Would you ever date 1?: Nah, it'll just screw the whole friendship up.

Would you ever date 7?: once again , it'll screw up the friendship

Is 15 single?: YES!

What is 19's last name?: oh no

What is 3's middle name?: pei xuan right?!

What is 10's fantasy?: hot unattainable man

Would 14 and 19 make a good couple?: wtf

What school does 16 go to?: my school

What school does 1 go to?: My school

Where does 9 live?: Bishan

Would you make out with 13?: I don't know

Are 5 and 6 best friends?: They're like stuck to the hip.

Is 20 older than you?: yeap

Is 4 the sexiest bitch prettiest girl alive?: HAHAHA WHAT!?

Is 17 your ex?: was hahahaha (don't take me seriously )

Do you ever see yourself with 12 and 18?: you've got to be kidding

How is 2?: she's adorable!! (=


my amigos , this is g'bye.( cheese galore)

yesterday was one of those days where you'd probably regret not having a fucking camera.Once again , I would tell myself. Marisse , just let it go.It's going to be one of those memories for the mind.usually very significant.yes no? For those of you who have no fucking idea what the fuck I'm talking about , I'm talking about the netball sec four farewell.The Candle thing was awesome (yes , very alyssa woo-hoo).We made a pathway of candles from the main hall all the way to the netball court at the end of the path we made a heart and inside the heart there were the words , we love you.Ain't we just a sweet bunch of fools.I'm in deep shit now , I've been partying non-stop.It's pissing my mum off.I'm going to chinablack tonight and To some other party tomorrow and the third place gig.I really wanna go for all the crap.HELP GOD HELP! =/

I'M SELLING 4 CHINABLACK TICKETS FOR
THURSDAY NIGHT ON THE 24TH OF
NOVEMBER FOR FLING THE TICKET COSTS
$12 IF YOU WANT THEM PLEASE CALL ME ,
MARISSE AT 91947511
OR IF YOU WANNA CALL ME JUST FOR CALL LA.
HA-HA OK NOT FUNNY.
BUY THE TICKETS PLEASE.

yes , I indeed have become an extreme one.
I mean who yells out at on the dance floor
like broken recorder that It's boring.
hot damn , that's me.
We couldn't get into cheekopeh monkey's.
They said the police was havin an operation
or at least some shit like that.
any-hoos , even our bartender and bouncer friend
couldn't get us in , yes hot damn.ha-ha.
so we ended up going to desire and phunk.
which was completely boring
ok at least in my opinion , phunk is cooler
then cheekopeh monkeys BUT it's emptier.
anyway so we ended up at desire
cause the guys didn't wanna pay for the entry
at phunk.anyway , they WERE fun afterall.
That small ah beng dude was funny
I think jin huey's high
he couldn't stop blowing smoke into my face
hello? what's up dudette?!
anyway , I was sayin to the ah lian
It's so sad we didn't even get smoke on our clothes.
damn , gotta go.ALL THE LOVE (=








yes gettin wasted was a better idea , esmond you are a lucky ass!

How I would Love to speak this words , but , I don't want to make things any worse.

Oh wells , It has been a very very eventful holiday for me.
So has it been a really really boring holiday for me.
I mean , who the hell gets kind of bored from clubbing.
I have been absent from trainin for 2 weeks
Somehow , everyone wants me there for training
see, I told you I'm undeniably lovable.
Marisse Wonderland currently cost 3 dollars per flight ticket.
Ain't I just a bowl of crap to sniff?
where's the sense in that.
I've been thinkin the most random stuff
I'm startin to think like daria.
Gosh , there's nothing in my hand , am I losing it?
On a lighther note , I am going for Fling.
Cause It's with my friend's
SO that clubbing seems well , fun.
I almost died at church the other day
due to lack of sleep, caffine overdose I suppose?
hey , it rhymes!slap me with a fish and dig a hole for my head.
Went out with binky today , It was amusing I must say.
It's boring yet un-boring
well what can say , it's binky afterall
You can never hate her undenianly nice presence.
Anyway On the depressing side of the holidays
It seems like I'm at your disposal again.
Oh well , what's new.I'm like a fool to you.
11th of november which so happens to be the 11th month of the year
at the 11 minutes after the 11th hour , I was suppose to tell you
the hellos , maybes , sorrys and goodbyes. I missed it.
screwed things up again , I always seem to screw something good for me
Go away! maybe I should become a goth or smth to suit my characther.
damn it I'm a fag , so g'night and g'bye to the holy mofo
in other words , me.


It's an oxymoron ,yet again another understatement

Yesterday I got forced out of my bed to go get a job by my mum and guess what!? At the interview to smart Alec remarks came out! Thank God! Temptation was high on my side to say it was my mum! She’s forcing me to take the job! I think it turned out fine. I hope at least I mean my fine is like normal people's average I mean when it comes to terms of acceptance cause I really don't actually give a shit about anybody who don't concern but if you're my friend, you're going to feel a whole alotta loveeee.hahaha considering my loopiness. Come on everyone I am undeniably lovable! Haha. Anyway, I hung out with my thirteen long relationship best friend yesterday. Oh how I love her. Her name’s Hannah. When I wanted to go home yesterday my card had no money! I was stuck at plaza damn it! Apparently, I had no money either yes everyone say, LOSER! I had money, but it was at home. I didn’t want to wait for a cab any more cause 10 empty cabs went past me like what the fuck. Anyway Stacy came to my rescue so all was fine we went to orchard towers with Joey Jin Hui and their friend to look at ho’s to see how they actually look like. Damn cool. Haha.anyway I may be writing a book but I don’t know what’s the title going to be. I sound crazy, I know. But It was my friend’s idea from church since I’m always talking about Ian, my imaginary boyfriend If you must know. He’s Hot! He’s perfect and He’s not real (damn the world) oh wells. What do you think of the perfect boyfriend as a title? A little too cheesy? I think so too. Unless you beg to differ, tell me! Love!






Hot damn , Ian.

Hello ev'ryone , I'm sick.

Yes , I've not blogged for a very long time.
It seems everytime I'm about to blog
Something comes up and I've to close the window.
oh wells my week has been very eventful.
From the last day of school till today.
Friday , After I lefted school with caishan
I met up with siewhwee and bekkah
we went to prissy's house we died our hair
It was really fun we stayed up and slept and about 5 am.
I left the next day and I went to the gym with bird
spent the whole entire day with cause I waited
for my fucked up group of friends that cancelled the
farewell party for azilah at the last minute.
Time , 11.30 pm.yea , what the fuck man.
Anyway at birds house it was like a romantic comedy
marathon or something we watched alot like love
then love actually and something else
television was stupid and boring.
but I loveeeee alot like love!
the song by *qu*lu** was really good.
Anyway then on sunday I missed bible studies
So I went for the 11.30 mass at christ the king.
Went to bishan with mum to get some stuff and have lunch
after that I was beat so I went to sleep
I woke up at 8 or 9 then met up with vicky
went to her house we did the usual stuff
then went to have coffee
we got stalked by this crazy indian man
so we followed this chinese couple home
we watch daria ( my current addiction)
I heart trent he's so hot and he's cartoon
then my mum ordered me to go home
although the initial plan was to sleepover at vick's
on monday , it was halloween
went to vick's house at 2 i think
then we watched daria , yes yet again
we went to sleep got dressed and went to indochine
I could get in but the rest couldn't
so we looked for a place to crash at
the initial plan was to crash at SPG's place
but decided not to cause it's not very nice
and the leather priest didn't want us to fuck things up
so we went to cheeky's at mhd sultan
clubbed till 3 or 4 am
then vick came over to my place
we smelt like fuckin shit
so we tooked a bathe
we talked nonsense till 5 then we turned in
we woke up at 12 or 1
I cooked breakfast for us
vick went to meet vicktour at plaza
she wore my clothes which
surprisly looked great on her
well party cause burberry shirts are universal
after she lefted I slept till 8 again
then I met up with stacy
and spread God's word to her
we hung out talked to jiaxin
then i went home cause of my mum
then I slept till the next day
I went to vick's place again
then went home then met up with stacy again
then we bought some old school shoes
and i went to my grannys' the usual( ev'ry wednesday)
I got extremely sick and rest till
the next day at about 4 then went home
then met up with jen jen JENNY (=
then she had to leave then I went home
then met stacy and her two 'cute' friends
then we met up with their friend
then we waited till 11?
then we went to cheeky's
siewhwee and bekkah were suppose to come
but they didn't have cash
oh wells ,met up with charis bird rachel michelle and leslie
son was suppose to come but some stuff happened
she couldn't make it so we went on without her
the club was the usual i'll update later about it
I need to go to the doc's
see you

Notice the amount of thens?

It sucks living life knowing you could've done something better.Yes , I'm talkin about the everyday perfectionist , me.I wanted it to end that night.But you wouldn't give me a chance.I even wondered whether my words even got to you.You were never meant for me, yes I know that.But at least let me clear things out.Why do I care.You don't even give a fuck about me.fuck it.I am going out soon.We're gonna get birds' you-know-what and go to grapey's later.I'm going out with LEE-YAH tomorrow.I'm looking forward to alot of WEIRD fun.I HEART ALYSSA WOO-HOO!

HAPPY SIXTEEN BIRTHDAY LEEZORD!

The stars that night but you weren't there with me It became just like any other night.Tell me why just one answer and you can leave , forever.

FOR THE UNDERAGED:
CHINABLACK
24TH NOV
PRE SALE 12
DOOR 15
NON ALCOHOLIC
AFTER PROM FOR SCGS AND SOME OTHER SCHOOLS
GIRLS IN BIKINIS CAN GET IN FOR FREE.
CALL VIKKI AT 93383450 TO BOOK
TICKETS ARE RUNNING OUT! SO GET THEM SOON !
PASS VIKKI THE CASH LATEST BY MONDAY.
( She is able to meet you whoever you are buying over the weekends if that's needed. )






For my lady , greensleeves.

my brains aren't functioning well enough now.
I don't know man , It's like ev'rything has got to do with me.
Somehow , seems to be revolving around the same situation.
Which is , so much reminds me of you.I've seen this all before.
Anyway , I gave school a skip today like most of my other friends.
But , I have the flu.I need a remedy man,It's fucking annoying.
I keep sneezing or my computer screen.
yogi doesn't want to let our saliva mix on the screen
yes , bad mental image.how gives a shit anyway.
I've got to have lessons with my mum at 5?
yes , how horrid It must be for me.
I'm sick and mum doesn't really give a shit.
I'm fucking depressed and tired now.
I miss you like crazy , how cliche.
It's just the imaginary you and me.
with this invisible wall between us.
I can walk through it , but I'm afraid.
Afraid of what you might ask.
I've got a whole list of afraid ofs.
But it's the rejection mainly.
I don't wanna feel it all over again.
I'm begging you for a phone call
I'm begging you for an email.
something to show me I'm in your existence.
There's no need to test my heart.
For it's clipped on to the back of your mind.
The joke's on me , really.
It's been almost two fucking years now.
In my mind , I pleaded for you not to go.
In my mind , I hoped ev'ryday that you might
Just MAYBE call me tell me
how you are tell me what you think about the yesterday.
The whole nine yards.
Schezophernia is bliss cause you're not alone (=

I am the ultimate grandmother.

I had my last paper today and It was what you might say , durable?
Had lunch with Shanny and some of my classmates for 30 minutes.
Rushed down to town and took 105.
I missed a fuckin stop and had to walk all the way down
how horrid , well It wasn't so humid then so It was alright
Met the rest at Far east ( The rest:Esther, Sarah, Sher, Jean, Amanda.)
When I reached there , they started worshiping me , as if
We walked around window shopped and the whole nine yards.
Guess who we saw!I saw Sharon Treeshaniniriripopohaha and sweeying(:
I SWEAR SHARON IS STALKING ME.
I SEE HER EVERYWHERE.
There after ,we went to watch Into deep blue
Yes , you should watch it cause it was (surprisingly) nice.
And yes, Jessica alba's fucking hell hot.
After the show we went to meet Alyssa woo-hoo.
EV'RYONE! ALYSSA IS NOT BOTHERED BY THE WOOHOO SHIT.(:
ALYSSA IS LIKE A CLOUD , SHE ABSORBS EV'RYTHING
AND RAINS IT DOWN ON OTHERS.
(yes , without a doubt , alyssa IS hillarious)
ANYWAY , as I was saying , We met up with her
Then we went to topshop and checked out the stuff there
Gosh , the jackets are gorgelicious.
I'm going to try to get my momma to try to spill some cash for me.
We all tried on stuff like you know , In the movies
where all the bims would dress up
and pose around.yes , that's what I'm talkin about.
After we went to far east.
It was really fun.I'm so happy when I'm around them
Went home after that with estreee and lee-yah.
Saw two really hot dudes obsessed with girls cleavages.
But nonetheless , they ARE hot.
but looked andro , HOW GIVES A SHIT ANYWAY
It was fun hearing alyssa talk about her obsession
with the 'Itchy' sign.
Singing away and all the fat momma jokes.
It was crazy.But fun! alyssa IS adorable
After that, met up with Zoe and Vikki my baby at cafe cartel(:
Went to shop at FOX, Vikki spent at least 70 dollars today. Oh my god.
Anyway, she got herself new 3 quats, 2 new shirts and Rach her birthday present.
Anyway, Bird did not receive her sms which said to meet us at bishan, so she asked her " Are you there? " And she said ' Yes ' well, that's cause she thought she was asking if we was at Bishan.
Anyway, she took a cab down and got quite upset when she realised we were still at freaking Bishan.
So Vikki and I rushed down to grapevine.
On our way she messaged us " Hey, don't come down, after I eat I'll leave. "
But We said we were on our way down, well in the end R went to meet her. ( Vikki doesnt know if she called R to meet her earlier on or R just decided to go. )
So we reached Grapevine, and guess what, Bird was no where to be found.
So Vikki rang her and she said she was at R's place ( either that or walking her home, but you get what I mean. )
Frankly speaking, Vikki got quite ticked off. Well firstly, we rushed all the way down just to meet her cause she was all alone ( It was my fault, I know. That she did not get the freaking sms. And it was only polite to acompany lonely Bird ). In the end, we took a cab down only to realise she's not there. On top of that we were broke, so that means, no money to even SIT AND EAT.
So yeah, but you know, Bird's such a darling.
(: So Vikki was probably angry for only 2 seconds. :))
Yeah, so we walked to Lizard's house to pay her a visit.
Moo-rese " Maybe we should just ring her door bell and maybe she'll come out in her Spag top "
Vikki " HAHAHAHA. Maybee. "
( On the phone with Lizard )
Vikki " Come down now "
Lizard " Eh wait I change into my tee shirt first. "
What the hell leh!
Well, she came down whining about CSI. Saying that we're disrupting her show, but you know what, we're much more important then some dumb fictional investigation show yes?
Yes good, agree.
Talked for an hour, and then her mom called her to go home.
It was actually really fun talking to her. And I've realised that the playground's floor near her house looks like a giant dick.
Okay random but whatever.
Vikki's mother asked me to go home at 1030, but she reached hom at 1145.
whereas I reached home at 12?
Vikki and I spent 11-1130 lying on the floor, sniffing her sour socks, while listening to my ipod mini. (: Quite fun with exception of the sour socks.
After that walked home.
Heres a random thought that Vikki and I were talking about today:
Why do people think Sex is disgusting, I dont get it. Isn't it the most normal and pleasurable thing on earth, how can one say sex is gross, when yet they've not experienced it. ( I have not have sex, so yeah. But I dont find it gross ).
Tanny is a very sexual person.
She's like so corrupted or something.

Guess what, Jill loves her. (:
hahahhah I don't know why I copied that for.

G'night folks.

Tomorrow's the last paper and It's not important.
I can't believe it!The holidays are almost here.I feel on
top of the world!!
There are so many things to look foward to.
That'll talk about later.
Need to go to the doctor with UH-LEASH-SHA (=

PARTY EV'RYONE.
Jill's the organiser(don't really know her , but I'm doing this for vick)
For the underage
Chinablack
24th November
Presale ticks 12
Door ticks 15
Non alcoholic
Its an after prom for some schs
call Vick at 93383450 if you want to buy

Yes , how photography never seizes to amaze me.

Someone who threw me life away.

It's just a thought only a thought.

Yes , A picture paints a thousand words.And now , my only choice in life is the go forward.Pretend that nothing in the past still hurts me affects me in other ways.Yes the changes happen In an not so obvious way , but that doesn't mean there ain't a change.I wanna hold on to you and never let go , no matter how cliche it sounds , I don't really give a shit.The other night I wanted to call you and tell you ev'rything that has happened but I didn't cause I don't want to make things any worse.It so happens I use to vomit these words.not vomit as in literally ,fuck I think you know what I mean.If I had things my way , I would turn the clock and stop myself from telling you.Telling you how beautiful you are.Stop me from my crazy hopes and shit of dreams.But If I really turned the clock then I wouldn't have matured in ways.IN WAYS!! HAHAHA cause I know how ev'ryone will start debating about my maturity.I am matured but I think lifes more fun being young acting my age or even younger.Well , destiny has decided that I should turn away from you and I wished things wouldn't have to end this way.

Did I mention that I really loved you?

Bang Bang this shot me down.

I screwed my math paper today.It was horrible and I couldn't help but laugh at Mary(azilah).She looks weird and to top it off she tied up her hair into pigtails yes , what the fuck.Went to study at the cafe again today.Yes , I really DID study.I even managed to study a few chapters.bottomline is , My life is starting to sound boring.Sounds so last year.I can't wait to hang out with the rest again. friggin su , she's using my happy pill and I'm the spoilt brat that doesn't want to share my bag of sweets.damn I'm bored.

I danced along the sidewalks.

Now and then I ask myself, why do I keep on making the same mistakes. Why have I become that bitter pill in the box of sweets. I spill my heart for you over and over again like a stupid moronic fool. It's hard to comprehend my on going chain of blue funk. So many thoughts so little time and I've got a math paper on my list of things to do. Oh how we use to talk to each other like we've known each other forever. Time flies by and It's been more then a year and half. I must say I'm 15 now and if you're reading this, which is prolly one out of a thousand, chances that you would be, I just want to let you know what an asshole you truly are. OK OK, you are not fully to be blamed. In fact, I can only blame my presumptuous self for being so stupid and making myself believe that somehow someday, you'll know how I feel. Just to let you know, you’re not making this easy.

The only time we ever talked in this month of October : In My Dreams

Yes It's a Sunday Morning And I'm really bored.


Last person you chatted with on the phone?
Phoebe

The last thing eaten?
Some shit that I don't know what It's called

Last person that you went out shopping with?
Alicia and Jenny

Last present(s) that you received?
My Birthday Present from my Grandma?

Last website?
Friendster

Person(s) you saw?
Mum

Last call you received?
Gwen

Last thought?
This quiz is fuckin boring.HEY THE VIRGIN SUICIDES HAS FINISHED DOWNLOADING!

Last time felt so happy?
My birthday?

Last time you saw your grandma ?
Friday

Last fight?
Maybe last week?

Last electronic device used?
'sides this , the tv

Last movie watched?
you got served or I love huckabees

Who's on your mind right now?
I don't know can't really tell , either phoebe cause I wanna go shopping and studying or nobody in particular.

Where do you really wanna go to?
Shopping and studying so , prolly the mall.

Which one do you prefer..msn or ym?
MSN.

Who do you miss?
right now , nobody

Where do you usually go shopping?
town but I'd love to try bugis.

Who cleans your room?
ME , I was made to just yesterday =./

What are you feeling right now?
Bored itchy and icky.

Ever thought of dyin?
Yes.quite often actually.

Who are your enemies?
I don't like to use the term enemies cause it sounds childish but , delicia.

Do you love your friends?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME.WHAT KIND OF MORONIC IDIOT WILL ASK THIS KIND OF A QUESTION. ISN'T THE ANSWER OBVIOUS , YES!! (=

Name 3 favourite things?
I'll get back to you on this one.

Who you think sucks in your school?
Delicia?

Msn who is the last who logged in?
My mother , Calista.

Favourite colour?
Red.

What are you doin now?
This shit.

Ok marisse , you have to go study now. ok marisse (=

Fizzo got Flo.

Engla's on Monday.But I'm doing ev'rything But studying right now.I'm listening to music.I'm listening to my mum sing opera.NO , she ain't a opera singer she's a Jazz singer infact.She sings Salsa Contemporary shit too.Bottomline , she sings anything but opera.But she has a sudden craze with opera songs not that she likes it.she find it rather amusing.Charlotte church.what's with opera.I just don't get that kind of music.I mean It's so easy to sing.I don't understand why people are willng to pay a fortune to sing easy shit.Anyway she's singing the shit cause she wants to sing it to her bandmates who'll prolly find it amusing.Dude , Even I find it amusing.What more them.Anyway , My heads so up in space right now with esther. we're already thinking about partying.partying , oh how I love partying.I can't wait for the last paper to end.Then Vick and I can go to bugis and run around at the water fountain shit thing.Anybody wanna join us?You're most welcomed to anyway.I can't wait for my english paper man.I really need to do well.I need to get higher then phoebe.damn I'm compettitive but I guess It's cause so many things have happened and I'm making up for my loses in simple small ways.Dude , I've lost my mind.

Mingle & Tingle.

Fang's birthday.Sorry , didn't upload all the pictures.

How lovely , A saturday afternoon all wasted in cleanin my room. I could've study , but no , My mum just had to force me to clean my bloody room which I was plannin on cleanin after the exams , really.Then how else can you explain the fact that I wanted to go to Ikea to get some shit for my room.Ahh Fuck it.Anyway Thank you Ev'ryone for my birthday.It was really special , not quite what I expected but it was s'wonderful.Thank you ev'ryone for the chocolata cake and the durian cake.Thank you oblivions , for breakin my bed.It was alot of fun.The pillow fight the dumb stuff we did.It'll be a shit that will be in my ass forever. =.).Yesterday I went to alicia's house again.It was alot of fun as usual.I just like being around her and celest they make me happy.I like being around people who keep me in my seventh heaven.I was sort of in blue funk yesterday , But the trip home to alicia's house cheered me up like crazy.Dinner was great too.I heart ISUZU and NTUC.(private joke).anyway as you can see , I have no mood for bloggin so ,cheerios!

The exams are approximately 172 hours and 35 minutes away.And I'm on the computer blogging.Now , can anyone tell me what the fuck am I doing on the bloody computer.hurry now , please raise your hand.If you don't you are going to stay back for detention.Marisse , please understand that you've rebelling against mrs thurai for the longest time and now that you guys are smooth , it's going to be a little be hard now don't you think considering you've apparently NOT BEING PAYING BLOODY ATTENTION. show me the money and rub my tummy.

I'm an emotional wreck inside.

Due to the current influences from pantat.I'm starting to not be such an alien in the music genre shit.Anyway , I went out with my mum yesterday.It was great considering she's one of the coolest mum you'll ever know and you'll prolly ever want.We went Shopping and went to the museum to see the vatican exibition and boy was it a blast dude.I'm in school and all I can fuckin hell say now is I'm so bored.The first thing I did when I entered the lab was read my bible and It was intresting.I love the bible it's probably my favourite book.I mean I didn't even know originally we aren't suppose to eat pork.Shitpeas, I'm so fuckin bored my brains are barely stimulating.G'bye.3 more days morons 3 more days.(=

You've got the Blues.


My years in PL have been rather queer.I've gone from that really really queer netballer to totally psychotic sec 2 retard to a rebel and to whatever you can think of.I use to be so emotional and now , I'm almost emotionless.I've gone from becoming the girl who cried herself to sleep to the girl who made people cry to sleep.well , ok not to sleep but you get what I mean.And now , I've become quite the holy mofo.I tore my heart open just to feel.And now that I've felt it , I kinda wished I hadn't then I wouldn't have gotten so hurt.As much as I want to close my eyes and with a blink of an eye forget ev'rything that happened.But I can't.Cause no matter what , the past will always be real.It's so hard sometimes.Somedays I go to sleep thinking to myself.Dang.That really happened to me.He did that to me.He let me feel the hurt that , sometimes enjoy not cause I'm a sick pervert.It's cause I can write songs when I get the 'feelin'.It makes you feel like you've got difficulty breathin and you feel like screamin.FFFFFFUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKK.but you just can't then when you cry, you can't stop crying.The world feels so fake sometimes.I remember when I was sec 2 I use to really afraid of yes , leezord and all.but really , they couldn't give two fucks about me.They're so narcissitic anyway.no offence.BUT they're really nice anyway.My birthday is nine days away.I don't really feel the excitment though cause I've nothing much to look foward to.Cause life for me use to when ev'ryone's celebrating with their families , my mum's giggin and the man , as usual , is MIA.but it's alright cause I'm sort of gettin use to it.When I was young I use to psycho myself into thinkin maybe she'll come home and surprise me but , I was always wrong.

HELLO I'M HERE IN THE DU SU GUAN WITH WANCHUNG CALISTA AND MY HIGH-CLASS GIRLFRIEND , SIVA.MY BIRTHDAY IS ON SEPTEMBER 29 EV'RYBODY.(siva asked me).This is one of those random entries you'd really nt wanna read cause it's sort of a waste of your time.I'm currently revising pythagaros theorem and trigonometry.which is , SUCHA BORE.but it's for the good of my own well-being.listen up ev'ryone , MURIZ IS STUDYING (=

MY SHOE SIZE IS EIGHT


HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHERYL =) , my morning started out bad.Met up with the rest at white sands.Our destination , Escape theme park. Had fun with the rides.Met a bunch of lowbrow fools in other words , uncultured people.surprise surprise , I did not stoop to their level.Went into the so called ' haunted house' pa-lease , haunted.sure it was scary at first cause of the darkness.It ended full of laughther there were only TWO GHOST OF HEAVEN'S SAKE.The rules stated no touching of the walls or ghost.I guess you can consider us rebels then.I pushed of the 'ghost' with the mask and he fell down.poor guy.I pulled of his mask. I pulled the other guys cape.WHAT SM AH!?I was literally playing tug-o-war with the guy with his fake hand.hahaha.It was fun.I heart sherylene weilyn sarah and last but most diff. not least , CHERYL.i'm beat.


I KNOW MY FEET ARE BIG.

My birthday is coming ev'ryone and I'm very deprived and going to live on the streets very soon.I really need to get some stuff please donate to the save marisse from the streets fund.

Red faded chucks
Black striped high cuts
Fox jacket
Fox shorts
Beadie stuff
red and black high stripey socks
fish nets
more canvas shoes
red dunks
that old school bag
those other dunks
jeans
that green and white circley printed
sling at that ah lian shop next to converse at J8
mango pants
the mango jacket
alicia keys first cd
crazy shades.
actually anything red and nice
anything la emeline
i'll love you anyway. (=

Did you know

My name is so cool.

Marisse means of the sea it origins from the latin name Maris and it means of the sea.It also means Mary in french ,it also means star of the sea or Saint Jerome associated the Virgin's name with the Latin phrase stella maris. Other possible meanings are (Hebrew) wished-for child; rebellion; sea of bitterness.

Isabel origins from spanish and latin it means Elizabeth in hebrew and elizabeth means god's promise.

Caine comes from the hebrew name cain which means Something produced or spear.Cain, the firstborn son of Adam and Eve, killed his brother in jealous anger and spent the rest of his life as a wanderer in exile.Caine also comes from the irish and gaelic name kane which means little battler.It also was Anglicized form of Cathán, derived from "cath" meaning "battle." Kane (kah-NAY) is also a Japanese surname meaning putting together or money.

went gyming with Jen Jen.We bathed there for hours.oh wells.

I stand outside my pretty house
I light a match and watch the fire
I call the cops
I run and hide
You watched me fall
like new york in an earthquake.
Oblivious I run and cry
Wrath builds up within
I suffocate you and watched you die.
I won't forget the day
I felt god through a kitchen knife
there wasn't any pain
With ev'ry passin moment
It just seems getting worse
The walls are gettin smaller
and so I'm here to say
I'm so inflicted with unnecessary pain
I dream at night about a dance
With someone I can't seem to see
We'd dance all night till dawn
And We can't seem to stop the beat
We're so in love
both sides not hurt.
roses , candles and game
we twist and turn
The love I yearned.
So much's been saved for.

I just came back from the airport went to welcome back vick and the rest.It was fun went with leezord and kelly met ann na there.yea it was fun.if you wanna know what happened ask me cause i'm not in the mood to type.hahaha.anyway , HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALYSSA!! (=

Who said we can't go back to how things were before.What happened today and yesterday shows that nothing is impossible.I spent two whole days with my bestfriend like before , before all the conflicts and people coming into our lives.It was great.It was like the old times , yea the old times.We went to town looking like auntes and we were behaving like aunites.we went to raffles to check siewhwee out at her workplace , soupspoon.when we got there , siewhwee was havin her break.The devil treated phoebe to a bowl of soup , more like a bowl of sin.I ate out of the bowl of sin anyway.yummy yummy yummy there was alot of food in my tummy.we walked to suntec to see what i could get for alyssa after walking a thousand miles we went to carefour we walked around we ended up sleeping on this swing thing at carefour the furniture section and ev'rytime someone walked pasted us and shot us a look twice , we'd do the peace sign.I really do want world peace.LOL.anyway I got alyssa her gift from aistoria or something like that then we went to the candy empire and we bought junk and HOME SWEETERS HOMERS (=

What's my excuse for not studying? I WANNA BE DIFFERENT!

Why do i Speak through the wind in hope that you'll be able to hear what I'm thinking.Hello , I'm the walking idiot.I seriously need a digi cam , SERIOUSLY.I have so many ideas for photography so I can put them in my portfolio.dang.anyway , I've reccently read the bible the part on the revalation.It's so captivating I even painted about one of the topics in it.The one about the city of God.(=

hello wello yellow

sunday - the netball carnival
It went surprisingly great , really.
monday - Ah-lians day out
The most boring outing of my life.But at least I finally got to hang out with Stacy.
tuesday - Family day
Came home from the grandparent's house went out with my mum to get my art stuff from bras basar(spell?) went to church headed to city hall went grocery-in met up with phoebs siewhwee and yenchuen.
today - homegirl day
Woke up missed training , dreadfully , went to mac to meet the 3-o yesterday for breakfast went home did my portfolio spray painted my cupboard and shoes and now I'm just chilling.

how do you do that?make me feel special again?make me feel like a love sick puppy chasing you around again?make me feel like an oblivious idiot again?it's incredible that you can still mesmerize me after all this time.you're impressingly perfect and i guess i sort of , still love you.(=

hello wello , yesterday we were all being so melodramatic when we were sending vick and the rest of the china . when in fact , they were coming back in just a week.we acted like they were going of , FOREVER.anyhows , just read the papers , well , sort of , the one about the mayhem in the US , namely the hurricane.Its utterly dissapointing how selfish people can be.Now , the end of the world is the B-all and end-all of ev'rything.Catholics are being laidback about it cause our faith is strong.Christians are being ,"OH YOU MUST REPENT" about it now.well , which is good i guess.I always say better to be pessimistic then optimistic.oh wells, i gotta meet phoebe now.till later.(=

hello ev'ryone , if you're not coming for PHOEBE's party , i repeat , PHOEBE's party , FUCK YOU.but i don't really blame you though since it's all last minute.anyway , I really hope you guys will come cause.Since the exams are just around the corner it's you're last chance to party hard dudes and dudettes.'sides i think the party's pretty cool since it's gonna be so sneaky and all.we're havin it at 9 cause it's actually our class party come chalet since the teachers will be leaving at 8 we're making sure the coast is clear so we can party out.I can't wait to get down on the dancefloor hard.oh wells , till then.(=

I've been bitterly stung my the queen bee. I just wanna take a lighter and burn the queen bee to death.

My life is beautiful.But I'm bored with beautiful so I'm just going to stop look up and smile , If you know what I mean.




Cause I don't really get what I'm trying say.

i'm feelin random so here's it.
i know the caption or whatever it's called is kinda screwed but , i think it's nice.it's true sarong party girlmy shit

HELLO EV'RY LIVING RETARD , THIS SECTION OF MY BLOG IS SPECIALLY DEDICATED TO JULIA AND EMO(=.They say my blog is boring cause all the stuff i write about are emotional stuff and it's borinngggg.dang.is it that bad??=?=/.LOL.so fine i shall talk about my situation now , i'm stuck with a really ever so crazy bitch of a retard namely , emeline chen yue xin.we're in the most big headed adorable but yet so annoyingly stupid julia's house technically , we're in her cousin's room.judging from his room he seems like a cool holy mofo and crazy emo is bored.she's like those autistic kids cant sit still from a minute and right now she just fell down just a few minutes ago , she was trying her chances at bein a movie director.but judging from her talent , i can just say , big fat juicy hope dude(=.we were just at loveland to help julia buy something, gawd knows she's really stupid she even needs help with buying something.didn't see vicky today.i feel oh-so-empty without her.LOL.i love her.i hate siewhwee and phoebe you guys can just enjoy yourself.i need a blue sky holiday.(=

I've never felt like this before.I've never been so gawd damn childish in whole entire fucking life.But it's you , you that crazy bitch of a retard.It's you who made me so fucking mad.The worst part is , I'm crying not cause of what you've done.I'm crying cause It's just oh-so-hard to let go of a friend like.oh well , i'm fallin to pieces ev'rytime.

3 words : I am fucking angry.Okay it's not exactly 3 words but doesnt it sound weird if i say 4 words?oh sweet mother of my fucking gawdd , i am a freaking sicko. how can i find humour at a time like this when i am at a point of wrath.I'm am not ohfuckingokay.

Hello, Today went by pretty fine. For the past few days I’ve been trying to keep my cool. I know it shows. But some people just can’t get use to the fact that I’m trying to be less rebellious. What the fuck. Why the fuck in the fucking world would you want be to retaliate. You crazy bitch, you’re making me sin again and again. Why won’t you just leave me alone? Anyway, I had this beautiful dream the other night. I was in love with someone I couldn’t see. We were having our anniversary or something. The memory of it is very vague. But I remember that there were candles, roses, and hot Latin music. I was in a dress. It felt so surreal. It was as if I was experiencing Latin Movie Kind of Love sort of like dirty dancing. But the greatest thing about it was, I was in love and you know what, it felt so good. The best part was, there was reverse psychology. I’ve already figured out my future, I’m going to grow up unloved and OVER-rejected. Depressing but predictable. Who in the right mind would love me right?




cause you had a bad day.

THINGS TO DO




1. Live within my means (is it spelt that way?)
2. Finish art portfolio
3. Watch more television
4. STUDY
5. start gyming dude.

oh man , there are so many things that have taken the backseat of my mind.I seriously need to take a good break from school and people maybe i should to go some mountain and get lost like in the singapore show , ' missing '.yes i know , ridiculous.gawdd marisse , get a grip. LOL

well , this month has been what you may say , happening? alot of stuff happened , really.but i can't reveal.anyhows , i've so called found a way to a brighter future.i may be able to take art , the love of my life.but i don't wanna get false hopes high and jinx it.cause i need to do up my portfolio and stuff like that and it has to go through the bird , the artist and angulia.i have alot of doubt that the bird will let me take the subject cause my art is sort of towards the dark arts.i hope i won't get all once bitten , twice shy bout' it.i hope i'd be more of , try, try and try again if i get rejected.well , god grant me strength to finish what i've started.(=

Life is full of contradictory. Today was a pretty depressing for many people who’re close to me. This morning a friend of mine was crying obviously I went to comfort her and found out she got heartbroken by the same person again. She said she’s sort of getting use to getting hurt. Honestly, in my opinion, no one in this world can ever get use to hurt. It’s just not very human to get use to hurt. Hurt can come in different forms like love, hate or even kindness. Anyway, this shit hasn’t got anything to do with what I’m actually talking about. Back to the main point, the same person hurt her more than twice. That’s what happens when you really love someone, you suffer. You’re the one always getting hurt, don’t you find? I compared her situation with mine and realize that there ain’t much of a difference cause you see she has really fallen in love with this person and is willing to wait for her. She’s been waiting for her for about a year now and she suffers in silence. I mean cause sometimes when you love someone, you do crazy things. Like, self inflicted pain or sometimes when you see the person you get all tongue-tied and when you think about the person you start to cry. He or she has always got you feeling low. You’re train of thoughts is running uncontrollably. Sometimes you can sit in front of the computer thinking what to write about him or her. When you decide to start letting go, it becomes so extremely hard it’s already been a year. You’ve seen too much of the person’s beautiful side. It’s already too late when you realize that you’ll never be with him or her. Then the stage of jealousy appears, when you see him or her with someone else happy, you feel like it’s the end of the world. You just can’t stand seeing him or her with someone else happy you become sort of possessive, which is completely wrong cause no one owes you a living. By the time you’ve let go, you become empty. You realize, it’s all been a wild goes chase and decide to bury a hatchet with the person within.

I LOVE MY BREASTFRIENDS AND I SAW DELIRIOUS.LMAO (=

to find out what happened during the 3 days of FOP , please refer to lizard's blog , matt_.blogspot.com.thank you.i'm going out with my woman in 7 minutes and i havent even gotten ready yet.she's gonna kill me and i'm not gonna do anything about it though cause i really feel like bloggin.although i know this entry will be lame cause i don't have much time.so yes i leave with 6 words , that sweet sly come hither smile.(=

I THINK EMOLINE IS WEIRD.(= well hello there angels from my living nightmare.what a weird entrance you might say but that was simply random.I'm so tired.I'm so tired that my eyes feel so dry as if they're about to crack as if there was a drought in my eye sockets.anyhows , today was great?yes , i think that's the word.did the usual thing school blah lunch blah home blah skipped trng cause it was PT.went to lunch with alicia eunice shanny sulynn and cher.we laughed we ate we did it all.headed home to get dress for FOP.went to meet jenny went to her house.met up with julia and lizard.went for FOP.it was really fun.it was what you say , coolio my foolio?i'm beat.i think i'll talk shit another day.g'night bitches and bastards and take care (=

ok , so days are just getting so lame.duncha think?the way i deal with things now is pretty weird.i'm becoming more frank then usual.lunar rhythms?prolly not cause my ' that time of the month' is already ending , thankfully.i'm trying this new thing which is not judging people before even knowing them cause it's just plain wrong.cause in the end you're the one that's at lost of making a new friend and you're the one at fault for being so fuckin hell judgemental.anyhows crazy fuckin mum i gtg.another day.(=

Well well , so today started out with me waking up to the killers.did the usual Monday stuff.school , training ,home with jillian.i love going home with jillian it always cheers me up from my crazy depression.unlike me , she's the white in black in other words means she's special ,she's what you say a happy pill?haha.school today was a big toilet bowl.i had alot of flushes today.where do i start?how do i begin?i have so many things to say but somehow , i'm havin this huge mind block.i can't think, i don't know how to put it words.i need to slow down my train of thoughts.i'm not even sure of what i wanna say.well , have you ever felt like as if you sort of liked someone but you didn't want to that someone.but you actually really really really wanna like that someone.but you don't wanna jeopardize the friendship by sayin something so stupid like , i love you.and it's like you think of that person almost 24/7.and everytime you're with him or her you feel like you're on top of the world and everything he or she says to you suddenly seems so significant and you're holding on to the promise you made to him or her but when actual fact , he or she has already forgotten about it.he or she hurts you so bad just by being him or herself and it drives you crazy when he or she gives you the cold shoulder but only for awhile cause they might be havin lunar rhythms and when they laugh at you're jokes or simply seem intersted in what you're talkin about you get all nervous and start spooning a lil and can't stop laughin cause you're really nervous.when he or she smiles at you , you will feel a ever so strong flush and you're only hoping and wishing that he or she'll notice the big change in you but truth is , it will never happen.well , if only you knew.

just a minute ago,right after i did a lil' of piano i went to study.i was thinkin to myself,what's there to study.so i was thinkin why not read since i've got so much time.'sides i've not finished readin the virgin suicides.when suddenly this book i got from some book prize shit caught the my eye.i was think, gawwwddd, that's sucha boring book.but then i realised that if it were to be boring why wouldit be a bestseller and why would i win sucha book.so i took my chance and stared readin it and to my surprise , it was splendid.it's beautiful , really it is.you should read it , it's 'tuesdays with morrie'.thank you serendipity.(=.it's on how superficial life can get and how superficial we are.we're all blind and yes it's true.we're all chasing the wrong thing.for example , we're trying so hard to please our parents or friends but at the end of day , it's not something you want.it's someone elses dream.who cares what people say about you.it's your dream,it's your life.cause at the end of the you're only accountable to yourself.you're pleasin your parents you're givin up everything but when really at the end of the day it will be love, always will be.a friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend yesterday.why?he says he thinks she's to good for him when frankly someone else its the fact that someone else has caught his eye.how cliche you might say.but seriously to love is to make sacrifices.she might not be the most beautiful person physically.but on the insides , she's a goddess.he has failed to treasure her and for that he'll have his on karma cause after all this time , he has sadly not been able to see her through it all.

nerz surprise parteh was awesome dudes.gawwd ,i'm startin to sound so 'dude!where's my car'haha.well anyhows , there was cribin there was grindin bottomline is , there was dancin!i'm so addicted to it and i don't think it's gonna be one of those things where you just have a fetish for a minute and move on with life like an infatuation with dancin.sounds wrong?well ,i don't care.haha.i love alicia tan.dear alicia tan , i like the way you move.(=.haha.anyhows , i'm beat.so to all those out there who missed the parteh.HA HA HA LLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR.(=

Hello there,still unable to decipher me?Well,I'm delirious and I'm as weak as a lamb.as fucked up as my life may be , I still count myself serendipitous havin a pretty exciting life.full of bonafide shit.i'm sort of the ,' when you really love someone ' mood.well, mainly cause of the fact that i'm listening to the song right now.ok yes i know , how cheesy.i think seriously saying , my life would be empty if i didn't have anyone to love.i'd be pretty boring,i think.there ain't a day i wouldn't be thinking of you.you always leave me feelin so so low.i would have loved you when you're right ,loved you when you're wrong ,love you when you're weak,love you when you're strong.Take you higher when the world has got you feeling low.i'd give you my last, only cause i was thinking of you first.That's what's done when i really love someone.to 'the one' i bet you know it's been hard for me.to 'the man' i bet you are as oblivious to everything as ever before.you're somehow becoming insignificant to me.you are fading outta my life.so dear dad please , do something.

today is like any other pissin day.i've sort of been stressed the whole day.maybe it's just a slight case of lunar rhythms i don't know.but i guess my regarding my situation right now , i'm a pretty scared person.it's not cause i'm a wimp it's cause of some certain reasons which i don't think is too appropriate to reveal here.it's quite personal indeed.if you wanna know , just ask me.whenever you see me in school or whatever.i've also been what you may say , cold shouldering? , a friend.haha.it's not that we quarelled or whatever.don't get me wrong , i don't hate her either.it's the fact that i can't stand her and her crazyness that's driving me totally out of my oh-so-insane mind.bottomline is , i don't wanna get angry at her.somehow , its' been going no sweat hands down , my way.i really don't wanna get my facts wrong this time 'round.so every move i make i have to do it with caution that i might hurt her.cause i don't wanna go screwing our so called beautiful friendship up.the worse thing is , i can't go acting out of impluse like my usual self.i'm not being hypocritical here and sort of backstabbin her.frankly from my perspective i'm actually sort of being thoughtful here.cause i can say this without thinkin twice that almost EVERYONE can't face the music and dance.that's what i hate about people they ask for the truth not willing to face the facts and only hoping that they'll here what they want.which to me by the way, is plain fuckin fucked up so to whoever out there , please change the way you think cause it's most likely to be screwed up.thank you.

hello , my heart is on the ground once again and i don't mean shit to you.it's not even shit to you.won't you even pick it up an throw it in the bin for me?wait , there's someone new.but i'm afraid to love hello.let's me call the person hello for now.i'm afraid of fallin in love again.love is a selfish scary thing.will someone please tell me the what's the deal with first loves?why won't they just die.i wanna love hello but there's that factor holding me down.hello is beautiful.hello is what you say , perfect.hello is just like 'the one'.that's why i'm so afraid now.cause i know what's it like to love someone so so perfect.it's in the way you look at me.that makes me feel oh-so-crazy.afraid but with a tad of excitment.it leaves me wondering what kinds of strings were attach to that stare.makes me oh-so-silly and how i wish you only knew how i'm feeling now.all i've gotta say is ,you've left me simply afraid.

g'day one and all (= ,here is a , i don't know how longs worth of thoughts.




my thoughts are screamin in my head.example , FUCKIN HELL GET OVER HIM BITCH!!.what the fuck is wrong with me.i'm becoming so cold and infront of my friends i act all emotionless.cold and funny that's what i gotta be right!?it fuckin hell pisses me off.fuck it!and so a writer takes his or her pen and writes the words again ,all in love is fair.yes , now all about the ' i don't knows ' and ' whatevers '.i've just to come realise that i'm a very depressed person yes i am indeed.i've reccently become a boring person i've become anti-social bottomline is , i've become empty.
empty like a can of soda that just got dranked by a person who just ran a thousand miles cause him or her has been hurt by their special someone that they really loved and have used excersing as a form of stress relievin.i hate the fact that the way you are just mollifies me leaving me nothing but my dignity.'what's wrong with you' the most common phrase i've been hearing for the past few days.which i currently think is true cause i'm crazy.and you still definately are my only one(bird,you were right).i should stop pretending cause i definately don't wanna be anything that i've been trying to be lately.sometimes i question ' the one ' why does he keep doing this to me.i go to church every sunday.i am a devoted catholic.i pray , i sin , i confess , i repent.but still i ask why does he take everything away from me won't he just give me a chance?i love lit but sadly i can't take it.i love geog but again to my dissapointment i can't take it.worst of , the one thing i love most , art is a subject i can't take. i question him why do i have such a fatal flaw.which if you know me well , you'll know what i'm talkin about but if you don't then that's just too bad.cause i won't reveal it like this.it just plain embarassin.=/.isn't she loverly , isn't she wonderful i may ask.I'm obviously jealous.I'm obviously devastated.yes devastation, that's right.you always leave me in a state of devastation.hello there the can you help me?i'm fallin apart cause of you.i'm strong with words but weak in the heart.

some random pictures.laugh your asses out of us , admire us , hate us , love us. i don't give two fucks about you.(= thank you.









check out the professional ah beng , bird (=







made in india , alicia and eunice (=







crazy bitch always lazy.haha (=







gay partners' birthday , pusstit;oblivion;polly;crazy;my woman;nicole;son (=







i can put my two fists in my mouth , WANNA SEE? eunice (=







boo hoo you. -_- , crazy (=







spastication , crazy;my woman (=







black and white parteh , ian;elane;sean;polly;crazy (=

he'll be back for me , i promise.




that's what i use to pray for everyday.i use to tell myself , he'll realised how much he actually loves me someday.but that day never came.you know why?i bet you do.cause i'm an oblivious fool.i didn't see that big slap coming.false hopes high , indeed.sometimes , i just wished you knew.i wish you knew how i felt , how i , everything.you drive me crazy.i wanted you so bad.so bad that no one knew how bad it was.i just wished me prayers were answered.well ,if that's the way it gotta be then , so be it.if only you were with me.i would have shown you the world.how love should be.bottomline is , i woulda have loved you right.

I'm not trying to get emotional but I am getting emotional again.you may ask why , but I'm sorry I have no answer for that.its like I have this everlasting pain.it's indescribable.It's not as if i'm trying hard to let go of you.but i just can't break through.To me, one night with you is like,one step closer to heaven.I can't get this heavy load of my chest no matter how hard i try.I think even a forklift wouldn't help.I haven't cried for 2 weeks now.I really don't want to either its a record i'll keep going for as long as i can.eternity would be even greater if i could.i'll be just fine pretending that i'm all devil-may-care.right now , my teachers see me as a rebel.my friends , a clown.my mum , a devil.the man, he's oblivious to everything i've done for the past 4 fucking donkey years.my achivements,my failures whatever it was he was never there.if he wants to now , i think it'll be a lil' to late.i've grown up.to the man ,you've missed my childhood.the bottomline is ,you were never there.why am i holding back tears again just cause i promised myself that i'd never cry again?why are promises made when they're always meant to be broken.it's hard to say how much i've fallen in love with your beautiful side.but i don't love or like you anymore at least that's what i'm suppose to be feelin.but you'll always be that special someone to me.like when i was on the way home just awhile ago , i picked up a flower that had just fallen from a tree.it was beautiful , it was flawless.it was everything he is that i'm not.then i threw the flower in the air to me it signifies that i've let you go.i now that sounds crazy but that's me crazy.i'm a sentimental person but not OVER-sentimental like lizardo.when i'm alone my train of thoughts would fly like the wind i'd think back of stuff that just happened awhile ago or a long time ago.i don't know what i'm talkin about no more.so i think i shall stop here.g'bye for now , you.

I'm not trying to get emotional but I am getting emotional again.you may ask why , but I'm sorry I have no answer for that.its like I have this everlasting pain.it's indescribable.It's not as if i'm trying hard to let go of you.but i just can't break through.To me, one night with you is like,one step closer to heaven.I can't get this heavy load of my chest no matter how hard i try.I think even a forklift wouldn't help.I haven't cried for 2 weeks now.I really don't want to either its a record i'll keep going for as long as i can.eternity would be even greater if i could.i'll be just fine pretending that i'm all devil-may-care.right now , my teachers see me as a rebel.my friends , a clown.my mum , a devil.the man, he's oblivious to everything i've done for the past 4 fucking donkey years.my achivements,my failures whatever it was he was never there.if he wants to now , i think it'll be a lil' to late.i've grown up.to the man ,you've missed my childhood.the bottomline is ,you were never there.why am i holding back tears again just cause i promised myself that i'd never cry again?why are promises made when they're always meant to be broken.it's hard to say how much i've fallen in love with your beautiful side.but i don't love or like you anymore at least that's what i'm suppose to be feelin.but you'll always be that special someone to me.like when i was on the way home just awhile ago , i picked up a flower that had just fallen from a tree.it was beautiful , it was flawless.it was everything he is that i'm not.then i threw the flower in the air to me it signifies that i've let you go.i now that sounds crazy but that's me crazy.i'm a sentimental person but not OVER-sentimental like lizardo.when i'm alone my train of thoughts would fly like the wind i'd think back of stuff that just happened awhile ago or a long time ago.i don't know what i'm talkin about no more.so i think i shall stop here.g'bye for now , you.

I don't know what's the matter with this fucken world.If you're not musically inclined , please stop tryin just cause its the 'in' thing now.please its actually kind of down right disgusting.As in seriously ,it actually makes you look like a fool to older more sophisticated musicians.wonderin why this sudden topic?I was watchin top fun on channel 8.yeahhs, and the people who joined it can't sing their way outta a paperbag pls and the rappin?IT WAS HORRIBLE.i'm not tryin to sound intellectual here but yes , the level of sophistication there was , ZILCH.i don't mean to be frank here but i just can't help it.one of the girls who sang 'ai ni' by the cyndi wang sounded like she had permanent helium in her system.try thinkin about it , am i wrong to say yuck?Singapore as a matter of fact are giving everybody false hopes about how the industry is going to bloom in the future as a matter of fact , it definately won't with people like sly winning 2nd place in the Singapore Idol , i don't see why we should even bother learnin how to sing or play an instrument.we can just sing in our 'in the shower' voices and smile like a mongoliod and do hands signs that are basically wrong.gawwd ,it's so mean for me to say this but , if you don't know how to please don't do it.you are embarassin yourself on national tv.GAWWD, then why do people have to try so hard to have their own sense of style or paying for vocal lessons when we have so called 'music' like techno which is simply wrong.we can just talk and record it and at some sounds to it and there you have it , music.in the dictionary the meaning of music is ,' the arrangment of sounds MADE BY INSTRUMENTS or voices in a way that is pleasent or exciting. " first of , they already said made by instruments and in techno they just use this turn tables or whatever ready-made shit they have.secondly , they said pleasent or exciting which btw techno is missin every bit of.so why have techno?i say we should just burn all the techno cds away an dump it in outer space.(=

i'm a bad person.
i'm a selfish person
i'm going to hell
i'm a very fuckin borin person
i've got alot of great friends
i've got a weird disfunctional family , well sorta
i lie alot
i swear alot
i'm a bitch.
you should stay away from me
you should hate me
i'm very fat.
i'm very dark
i'm very ugly
no one likes me
they're just being friends with me
out of pity
i'm pathetic.
i'm gonna grow up to a taxi driver
i'm gonna be a spinster
i'm prejudice
i'm racist sometimes.
i'm not a people person
i'm a wannabe
i can't sing to save my life
i'm so untalented.
thank you , you don't wanna know me.
BYE

HELLO , today once again is , Sunday.todays' Sunday is not just any Sunday.It's bible Sunday not only that , it's 'the mans' birthday.what can say , ain't it just so special.right now , you've probably sensed the sarcasm.if you haven't , you're lost dude you truly are.anyhows , today's a pretty weird day for me as in seriously.i don't know.its like one minute i'm sleepin and the next moment when i wake up i become almost emotionless.in church i was feelin emotional and no , i didn't break down and cry.i was suppose to meet best friend.i waited for almost an hour.i figured she fell asleep so i went home.this time , i wasn't even angry.there wasn't even an inch on wrath that can be detected within me.i just went home feelin blank.bought food and went online.todays on hell of a fuckin boring day i must say.

hello , i'm weird.
thank you goodbye.

I feel inferior to you , physically hate the fact that somehow , to me ,I am better than you in alot of ways.not sayin i'm perfect.but its the fact that its always so easy for you.but its so hard for me.he gave me all this gifts.but i can't do nothing with them.i feel deprived.i hate this situation i am in.'the mans' birthday is on Sunday another day to feel depressed about.i'm havin lunar rhythms now which is makin every situation i am in seem worse.why am i pretendin that nothin is happening when everything i wished would never happen is happenin.its like my nightmare with deja vu.i'm so fuckin fustrated and i feel faintish.my mind is so painful.i can barely type.my eyes are turnin so fast.i can feel my brains twich a lil.its drivin me nuts.i hate the fact that there's no one for me to love.i hate the fact that i have this gut feelin its cause i think there ain't gonna be no one as perfect as you.i hate the fact that everytime i see you i still cant take my eyes off of you.i hate the fact that everytime i think of you i cant breathe.JESUS SAVE ME.

today's a sunday.yes , sunday.yesterday was a weird experience for me.shan't talk bout it to save a friends face.went out with momma the whole friggin day.met up with siewhwee and phoebe.waited for a fuckin hour and they didn't even call to tell me that they didn't know the way.worst of , they asked me to meet them at topshop and when i got there they weren't there.so i had to walk to a pay phone to call them cause i dont have a fuckin phone.but when i met up with em.i was too pissed my whole day got ruined by em.so i just left them i was fuckin angry and fed up.i mean hello , who doesn't know where wheelock is?fuck this shiat , forget it.the more i think about it , the more pissin it gets.anyhows , at home now.trying to get emo.yes , again.its becomin so cliche.i think i'm a melancholic.sorta , haha.i've promised myself that i will get through this.yes i will so i'm pretendin to like someone now.which to you guys ,is pretteh crazy.cause if you like someone , you like someone.how can you pretend right?!oh wells , its cause i have no one to write songs about so i'm just using this person but i'm still writing about the other person.okay,complicated.don't get me?go figure.=p.it feels like its raining in my head.raining with thoughts that is.alot alot alot and a hell alot of thoughts.i realleh want to talk to someone as in SOMEONE.but i have no idea who.i missed how things use to be as in when i was still that love sick puppy chasin you around as in, everytime i see you.my stomach would be filled with the butterflies.my shoes would grow wings and i'll start floating around in my mind.but i guess that butterflies flew out cause i dont get that funky feelin anymore i mean i still do but not as much as before.i use to wish for the fever to break.now i wish i wouldn't fade.cause i really do love you miss you and will always cherish you.so if i have said some weird stuff in the past , please forget i even did that.cause when i'm around you everything i'm tryin to say comes out wrong and its hard to come out right.so bye for now , i'm gonna take on the world.

i dont know whats wrong with me.i think i'm a freak.why does it feel like there's an earth quake in my head.idon't understand.
to think i wanted to know you.i tryin my best to let go ya' know.but its so hard.i was thinkin maybe it'd be easier if i had
someone else to like as like what lizard said , ' friends with potential '.but somehow there ain't anyone i can love , as in
if i wanted to turn crook it'd be so hard cause ya see the thing is everyone i know has someone to love example , eunice-princess,
bird-rachel,lizard-you-know-who,tanny-jeslyn,alicia-i dont know,phoebe-haojie,and the list goes on.i mean i want to ask anyone to spend like 2
weeks with me i just wanna know how it feels like to really love someone again.the last one wasnt counted cause it was in primary school
which was stupid goes to show you shouldn't have relationships when you dont understand love yet.anyhows , i realleh wanna know who does
it feel to love someone else treat the person right,i swear i'll be the sweetest thing ever , not bein thick skin.but yeahh.i'm realleh sad
cause i ain't got anyone to love.i love you still but thats different cause i'll never have you.i'm tired of runnin after you.jealousy just
slapped me in the face like that.its hard for me to get this over with and let go.in simple words , i cant break through.i need someone to
love i sound desperate but yeahhs.i really do.i wanna do things i've always dream of doing and no , not SEX.i know i've said this before but
i wanna give a person my all and make the person love me for who i am and break up with the person so i can hurt him or her.but i know i'd
prolly love the person cause i'm really not that kind of person.cause i know whats it like to be hurt.and you know whats the saddess thing
ever , its the fact that you still dont know me and never took the chance to and i never really got to know you well but from all i've heard
yer the greatest thing ever.but if i look on the brightside thanks to you i've matured alot over this period of time.which i would realleh like to
thank you for.




it's not that bad , you're just the best i ever had

ok i know i've been sorta of a sober person for the past few days i still am but i think i've sort of cheered up.well , that's cause i've been listenin to happy songs more to the swing kinda songs.if you've got exsquitsite taste you'll prolly know who's cole porter.yeah , i'm listenin to his songs.they're jazz songs but more to the swing.very beautiful music and beautiful lyrics.very witty very very good.really helps me extenuate things.eally not in the mood for tv.so i'm gonna miss my thursday routine.i think old songs are really good as in the lyrics music everything the lyrics nowadays are so explicit but i'm not sayin i don't listen to em.i do alot.just sayin how stuff use to be so , pure.i know it sounds weird.but yeah.pure.like how stuff use to be like bein oblivious to almost everything.you hate bein oblivious to things but when we know about stuff.we start thinkin how stupidity is bliss.anyhows , i'm actually kinda glad i'm kinda over the 'in love with someone' stage because i cant make sense in what you've done when i start to cry and start to run you actually didn't do anything to hurt me.no , actually you did.just by bein yerself has hurt me alot.why do you have to be so perfect.i think i was actually over you but i just really didn't wanna let go cause i was afraid and i didn't know what to do.it still hurts me when i listen to sad songs just thinkin about the past , you my dad , my mum , EVERYTHING.so for now , just look ahead and i'll try my best to smile without hiding a billion tears.(=

as you fuckers can see in the below entry , i've officially become boring.yes , boring like how thing were before , BORING.'sides the friends factor that is.you know wanna know what to do when the one you love is with somebody else , technically he ain't but its realleh obvious he's still loves jayne.what do you do when there's nothing you can do about it.its plain easy.its actually common sense.3 words.deal with it.yeahhs.the way i deal with things is by running away.yes RUNNING AWAY.its just always like that.and after running away from the problem situation shit thing whatever.i'd start reminiscing bout it and be filled with regret like , why didn't do this the other time or that or whatever.i'd ponder on it and the more i do the more fucked i get.whatever , the word most commonly used in my vocab.thats what you guys know thats all.you guys think whatever means i'm running away but i'm sorry to dissapoint you but your fuckin hell wrong and neither does it mean its a no strings attach kinda whatever.my whatevers always have a meanin behind it like , case senario one , yes it sounds like some scientific shiat.bear with me alright?so anyhows , example when eunice and or or lizard are teasin me bout my skin colour or whatever when i say whatever i means its either so cliche cause they've said it a billion zillion times and its not funny anymore or it really has hurt my feelins and i'm just smiling and sayin i'm ok when truth is i was then , hidin a million tears.yes , i do have feelings.i know i'm fat ugly dark and fully indian or whatever but i do have feelings.well, cause you see the thing is you guys realleh don't know me.you guy never did still dont and will never know me.unless i tell you guys that is if i'm drunk or something.which apparently will never happened.when i tear its either cause i'm tired or emo.if you realleh know me you will know when i'm actually crying which you guys obviously will never be able to tell apart the tears.and this time 'round will never get the chance to cause after my last cry , i promised myself i'm never gonna ever forever as long as i can cry.

i've been tryin for the past hour to get emotional yes , weird?but hell no i ain't weird.cause you see the thing is , i'm actually quite an emotional person.i think i get jealous easily.basically its usually cause i'm realleh not a beautiful person as in physically.mentally i dont know.people think i'm a person that never takes anything or anybody seriously but the truth is i realleh do.see you guys realleh don't know but sooner or later you guys are gonna see right through me.if you dont i'll eventually open up.i'm a realleh confused person.right now , i think i'm sorta back to square one as in not the in love square one.as in i've got nobody to love not as in i have a boyfriend i dont like anyone.its back to the days i randomly selected tricia to like and true enough i realleh fell for her beautiful side see when i like someone their flaws are so insignificant to me already.i don't know man.i realleh wanna fall in love with someone.but this time without sheddin tears like what you, the past , had done to me.i wanna realleh fall in love with someone.i'll realleh treat the person right.but well i guess , i'm just gonna grow up to be a spinster.to him it realleh didnt matter how i felt inside.this life is sucha game sometimes.just that i'm always on the losing side as in im always the one endin up hurt.love is selfish love is blind.it makes me jealous makes me go outta my mind.jealousy.tsktsktsk , jealousy.well this time its what helped me realised that things between me and him are realleh not go any furthur.well then to love , i say goodbye.i'm not gonna cry anymore or feel emotional.i'm gonna be this cold person and the party animal everyone expects me to be.ok so well , fuck you all. (=

just came back from alicia's parteh it was realleh good actually on account that it was a last minute planned parteh.the turn out was actually great yeahhs.the parteh started out not exactly great.but slowly the moood started to change we started socializing and everthing.met some people like , sean tan which btw is esther tans' brother yes , what a small world indeed , sean , kun yao , ian , mark , russell , derrick and alota other people.i was realleh suprised that esmond actually turned up alicia's right as in the people we expected to turn up realleh didnt and the people we didnt realleh did.well , life is unpredictable.anyhows , the drinks were great.great job mixing the drinks eunicey.hahaha.lucy and lizzie.nevermind i shall refrain from embarassin.there are to much stuff to say about the parteh yeahhs.i think one page just ain't gonna be enough.yeahhs.stuff indescribable happened.actually the entertainment wasnt that bad it was only the dancin yeahhs no one realleh wanted to dance cause there were tooo many guys.yeahhs.but actually thats not the point about dancin its not to show off how great you can dance.dancin is the voice of yer inner soul.yeahhs.some people wanted to dance actually wanted to dance example , ian.but by the time he wanted to , everyone was beat.hahaha stupid ass.esmond said something that got me like all ponderin, ohs wells.anyhows , the kun yao and the tents thing was damn funneh and the spellin game with him when he got wasted was realleh fuckin funneh.they are realleh nice people.the 'bondin' at the so called back yard will truly be remembered.hahaha.gawwd, i sound like im goin to die.but seriously , alicia , it was nice (=

when i was listenin to this song just now it realleh made alota sense to me as in every mornin i wake up i put on this face thats gonna get me through the day it doesnt realleh matter how i feel inside right?i doesnt realleh matter how your friends is feelin on the insides as well.we all put on this big fake smile or our normie faces so we can get on with our lives and so our friends will not ask us are we a'righht or whatever but realleh deep down inside you just wished they could see yer real side.i think i've decided to quite the detergent commercial act and get on with reality im gonna express myself the way im suppose to which right now i have no idea how to.well , you see the thing is the stuff i've sad above isn't realleh bout you guys its mostly me yes mock me call me a selfish bitch its all about me yada yada yada but i think the bottomline is we or i realleh need to open up.thats it.g'nighht my friends

Some days I sit , starin' out the window
Watchin' this world pass me by
Sometimes I think there's nothin' to live for
I almost break down and cry
Sometimes I think I'm crazy
I'm crazy, oh so crazy
Why am I here, am I just wastin' my time?
Sometimes it feels like the world's on my shoulders
Everyone's leanin' on me
'Cuz sometimes it feels like the world's almost over
But then he comes back to me
People make jokes cuz they don't understand me
They just don't see my real side
I act like shit don't phase me
Inside it drives me crazy
My insecurities could eat me alive
But then I see my baby
Suddenly I'm not crazy
It all makes sense when I look into his eyes




too good to be original
i got it from a song just edited it a lil
g'nighht fuckers (=

today was GREATT (=
first of i had a not
like every other year's
depressin father's day
cause i celebrated with
meh grandpapa (=
anyhows , then met up with
kristle and MY WOMAN
which btw is VICKY (=
anyhows , eunicey alicia
tehknee phoebe bird nerz
and esmond were suppose to
come.but in the fuckin end
did not but we had fun anyhows.(=
so i wont hold it against em'
anyhows , we went for the
ROCK ON SINGAPORE FEST
yesterday and today (=
it was ROCKIN GOOD FUN!!uh-huh
the malays there were sultry.HAHA
i have a current fetish yer malays.
i dont know i just think they're cool
by nature.so funky.wanna be one
i can sure be one if want to
cause of my ultra brown skin colour.
and no one will think i'm a poser.
yeahhs.anyhows,i think fatskunks
electrico and rolnin are realleh cool
although the guy from ronin looks
like sly but has a nice bod but realleh
cannot dance to save his fuckin life.
and the guy that i think who's pretteh cool
didnt smash his guitar so that i can have
a piece of it.but overall they're realleh
ROCKERS with the capital R (=.
vick and i danced our friggin hearts out
oh yeahhs saw beatrice with nikk at
topshop wisma too.yeahhs, i know what yer
thinkin dudes but no , they aren't together
anyhows,as i was sayin yesterday at the fest
vick went on stage and head banged
correction , body banged hahaha.
she was pretteh cool indeed
i think she should have won
against that indian girl yeahhs
so they made it a draw.
but whatever so long they had fun
plus the prize was fugly
anyhows , we wenta yogadi bearodi luciferishy
which btw is , eunice yong 's house
hahaha , vick said it was
like a pettin zoo
and eunice of course had to be the animal
then i started havin wild imaginations
of her actin like a gorilla . yeahhs
haha i know weirddddd.LMAO
anyhows ,




CHEER UP EUNICE (=

today once again is
FATHER'S DAY
which apparently i celebrated
with my grandpa (=
HAPPY FATHERS DAY!!<33
every year i dread this
particular holiday.
but this year i guess,
it was pretteh a'righht (=
that's a first. haha
anyhows , today is the
rock on singapore part two
yeahhs cant wait.((=

life is so unpredictable




this morning when i woke up
correction , this afternoon
when i woke up i called my
bestfriend who i shall not
name because its best that
i keep this low profile
for awhile till she's
ready to open up.yeahhs.
so as i was sayin.
one minute we were all jokin
the next minute she recieved
a phone call sayin her dad
had passed away.this sounds cliche
but life is so unpredictable
i'm realleh worried bout her
but as for a dad ,
i'm realleh happy for him
if God thinks its his time
so be it righht?
cause ain't he gon' be in a
better place after all
he doesnt have to experience
the end of the world
which btw, i think is coming
which is good righht?
as for my best friend ,
i think what she
realleh needs now is
moral support,and obviously
the magic word , LOVE.
from this i've learnt
never say never
cause you never know what
the future holds.
like when you were in primary
school.does BEST FRIENDS FOREVER
sound familliar.its so cliche
but the term is used
but never actually practiced
cause once yer in high school
you start to drift apart
and the term has totalleh taken the
back seat in the yer life
the term has become so i
nsignificant.
but as time passes ,
it will be used again
yes , with yer new best friend
but this time you never know
whether forever is for real ,
cause the bond is stronger
and as i have said
life is so unpredictable




GOD , GRANT BEST FRIEND STRENGTH (=

wassup china.
vick , yer parteh
was radical.IN THE END.
no offence though.
but i realleh love you anyway (:
i aint got no flo tonight
so night ya'll ((=




yo vicky its yer burfdeh ,
its yer burfdeh we're gon'
parteh like its yer burfdeh

wassup folks(=
today is one of days
where i'd stay home and start to sober
yes , fuckers sober
people always have this fix image in their fuckin
screwed up minds about me
they always think i'm this party animal
with no emotions and sober
will never be a word i'd have in my vocabulary
well guess what fuckers you're wrong

AND SO I SKIPPED HOME




BACK HOME FINALLY
YES FUCKTARDS I SKIPPED HOME
SOMETIMES I'M SO UNBELIEVABLE
TODAY I WOKE UP A LIL SAD
BUT HAD FUN THE WHOLE FRIGGIN DAY
THANK YOU CHINAS!! ((=
ANYHOWS.we were suppose to go
ta veekees' house today
but we didn't we ended up goin
to eunicey yongey the bear's house
anyhows.had alota fun
sulynn siewhwee and phoebe
came along too ((=
after that wenta grapevine
met up with an na her sista
which i have no idea whats her name
its either nicole or nicola
she's pretteh cool i guess
anyhows met up with alicia
rachel and celeste(spell?)
yeahhs.vick siewhwee and rachel
went home ahead.yeahhs
went home with alicia and celetse
yeahhs.skipped home pretteh high
HAHAHA.no idea why either
anyhows. HOME SWEET HOME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VICKY!!!
i love my sweet gay partner((=
i'm beat. fuck you ((=

TODAY WAS A'RIGHHT I GUESS
THE DAY STARTED OUT PRETTEH BAD EH
yeahhs.but shall forget bout it
dont wanna make myself depressed
WELCOME BACK POK!! ((=
i've missed you dude.
if you darn fuckin readers dont know
what the hell am i talkin about
its cause i havent mentioned that
i wenta see jenny at the airport
with bird wenta see rachel an-na
and dionne too.((=.totalleh fun
THANK YOU BIRD!! as in for the day
it was fun.i was a lil` depressed at first
anyhows. had alota fun my china. ((=
DUDE!! where's my car..
cant stop shufflin yer hair
its gettin pretteh addictive
hey phoebe , siewhwee cheer up my besties ((=
LURVEE YA GUYS.

yesterday.woke up at 10
called vick about 5 times
to wake her friggin hell up
damn it she sleeps like a dead log
HAHAHA.BUT I LOVE HER!!((=
wenta meet bird and zoe at the station
wenta sentosa together
but before that we wenta get some stuff
like apples ((= sushi and drinks
and VICKY'S breakfast.HEH
when we got there we met up wit
amanda sijia kristle and glynnis.
we swam for like i don't know
how many damn friggin hours.
we tanned . yes people .i tanned too
i got new tan lines ((=.YEAHHS.
kris sijia and birdeh got tanned like
friggin hell man.HAHAHA.esp. kris ((=
after that brought birdeh kris and vick
for some job interview thing
later , met up with the rest at grapevine.
oh yeahhs! HAHAHA forgot to mention bout'
the walk back to the mrt from sentosa
damn friggin hell funneh i tell ya.
vick and i were playin our so called
'dare game' hahaha.i made vicky eat some plant
HAHAHA.she made me bite some divider crap.
we both chased buses cars lorries u name it
anyhows.we played pool at grapevine ate
wenta phoebs house after that then
HOME SWEET HOME ((=
called up phoebs and all
i'm sorreh eunice. HAHAHA
kept on teasin her.
its actually quite fun.
but i don't hate you ((=
I LOVE YOU TOOO MUCH MAN!! HAHAHA

today
woke up late
didnt go for trng
dont know whether i'm gettin the job
at the soup spoon. siewhwee got the call
i didn't i feel realleh angry at myself
like what the hell went wrong
i prayed and everything
i hope i get the job realleh want it
and i realleh need it.=/
gonna meet the rest at 4.30
to study ((=
then we're goin for my church crap
then after that fetch jenny from the
airport.CANT WAIT. I'VE MISSED HER.
been missin dorry too.
gonna miss candiceHO too ((=
HAVE FUN MY FRIENDS LMAO

sometimes i wonder
should i walk away from this life
should i forget about you
must i let go
must you walk on by
if only you could tell me why
why did you hurt me
why did you let me go
when my heart started to flow
if only you could tell me how
how this shit started
how did it get this far
i've said this once
i'm gonna say it again
STUPIDITY IS BLISS
if you were dumb
you won't know how lurvee feels like
and i wish i never found out
gawwd.i hate this friggin life
i wanna walk away from it
start a new life
as someone else
but that'll never happen

missed the ' midnight affair '
filled regret now.
thanks to nerizza. =/
HAHAHA. kiddin
cause she made it sound sooo good.
but anyhows.chillin wit
hwee alicia lizard and eunice
was realleh fun too.
thanks alicia for the skirt
so damn sweet.HAHAHA.
ate sushi.was sucha rip off.
hahah. and the ' shake it up baby '
taxi uncle was pretteh cool
alicia's house is damn nice.
town was fun.
the conversation on the phone
wit eunice and siewhwee was fun too
OUR LIL SECRET HAHAHAHA
wenta study wit phoebs
eunice siewhwee and yinwen today
didnt study much
compass sucks totally.
HOME SWEET HOME =))